Monday, July 23, 2007
hi.im dreadfully tired.i cant talk or eat in peace.i cant sleep.i cant share everything with people.went home,dragging my feets behind.leaving footprints everywhere i go.im not being negative.but from the way everything goes today,i didnt exist.i really didnt.problems occur to me everytime when im feeling extremely happy.i just wonder why.haiz.and i do not want to be rude to my parents.im scared of being rude to them.maybe its just the satans doing this to me.i dont want to be an insolent child.i just want to be an individualist.im trying to reform myself to be a better person.what something serious HE said struck me through the heart.i really should change.im not going to be gullible or naive ok.since young,i had the chance to indulge into the world of being independent.i am a big girl.but they told me i wasnt.and big girls dont cry.but i let that phrase pass.i cried enough.god's testing me,i know.i can live w/o friends.but family,NO.but everything and anyone just wants to leave me.and why,must god take the one i like or love away?im being patience enough.i just feel like closing my eyes and fall into a dark,dark sleep.then will my problems go away and i will be happy in that 7th cloud.ending life just seems so difficult though.well but fear not,i wouldnt.i just wanna change to be one true example of a Muslim.pray for me yea.may god bless all of you who's reading this.people who wants to change for the better,lets join hands and say that we can do it.INSYAALLAH.and one more thing.dont worry guys,im ok.i just wanna cleanse my soul,thats all.goodbye little people! :]
That smile. Y
3:54 PM