pinkyee

2009-07-11T00:14:00.003+08:00

know what if i can travel back in time? i wanna learn how to take care of myself alone. i wanna learn how to MMOB (mind my own business). i dont wanna be a listener anymore. goodbye.

P.S. im not gonna post anymore for sure. closing the blog down soon. Os are my top priority.

love,
ain

2009-07-10T17:31:00.003+08:00

hi readers!
i doubt people read my blog anyway. haha.
by the way, i was having a bad week last week. the first day of school and i have to get home. BECAUSE of my fever. the 2nd day MC i got was the worst day. i almost died that day. i have never gotten a very high fever before and its amazing to read off the thermometer that my temperature was 39.1 degrees. you could like cook sunny side-up egg on my tummy. hehe. okay back to my studies. hm, i guess im left with 3 or lesser months to the O Levels. as the day passes, i begin to feel more anxious and nervous. and back to the Mr T guy, i think me and him will never be together. i feel better being friends with him. so far, he's still nice. but i just feel so incompatible with him, thats why i decided to just stay as friends. maybe i felt more suitable with a 'bad guy'. so yea.. hm, anyway, there's this girl in my class who i really can't talk to. she is so weird. i feel so sad for her sometimes when the guys disturbed her in class, but the thing is she made me to not like her. tengteng's been my best buddy in class! i love that girl. and for goodness sake, i never have a close Chinese friend before. hope we could pass our Os and get out from that school asap! so yesterday, i had sortaof small class reunion. the people i met ytd were syafiqa, ana, fauzi, athirah, azah, natt, amirahnorris AND naja and khalee.haha.its great to see them again especially si syafiqa and shazana! i super love athirah's braided hair by the way!! okay then, i have to go and check my other things like facebook.
goodbye readers! :]

love,
ain

goodbye post

2009-07-09T17:20:00.002+08:00

hey people. i will be going away for awhile until my internet broadband's been repaired. so ya, goodbye. :]

2009-06-05T18:40:00.002+08:00

hey. so i just realised that everyone reads my blog. yelah tu, haha. im not even popular lah sey. :] ok back to that hmm, well now i know that my guy friends in my school reads my blog. how do they find out?! i dont believe this. and now, i guess they know who is MR T! OMG, OMG. yaaa. anyway, i went to DAISO today at IMM alone. haha. went to buy a handphone pouch and a box for my mom. ya, i know such a cheap present huh? im totally penniless. :[ so for now, gotta wait for my next week's allowance. yeah. ohya, my mom's birthday is tmr! she's gna be 47 tmr! can you believe it that she has lived for 47 years!!!and im only 17!we're 30 years apart, i really dont believe this.anyway, i know i have been saying about "renovating" my blog. but with the upcoming Os, i doubt i can do it in the nearest time possible. and ya, for ppl who want me to link them, im sorry but i'll link you when i renovate it. really sorry! ok have to go now, post some other time ya. :]

love,
ain

2009-06-02T15:16:00.004+08:00

well, school's been okay for today. ms merdu said that khalee and me actually does not need to go for POA lesson for the whole 2 weeks. i really need POA lessons and ms merdu instead asked me not to come. and the thing is, her POA lessons are like clashing with my own class schedule.wth.i mean im not that SUPER GOOD at POA and it seems that she can see i can do well for POA.haiya.dontknow lah.anyway, i haven't tell you guys some HOT story!!haha, i loike this gossip.okay, well i have been hearing some news about this guy who likes me. [okay, i excited sendiri kat sini! haha.] ok back to the story, lets name the guy T! haha, thats a hint tau... i heard this T likes me but was shy to ask my number i guess. then, that time while we were bored at DNT room, we decided to prank T. and yea, so now it seems we have each other's number. but the thing is, i did say to T before that he's free to text me anytime anyday. and the thing is, sometimes its me who's been waiting for T to text me.i guess im still waiting for that MR RIGHT or should i say,MR T[hahaha!] to make a move.for now, i quite like T. he's a very nice guy,i could say. he's polite and he respects others. he's too good for me! btw, i saw JAS at the DNT room and i sure like it seeing him in his grey tank top. i loike! i kept saying "waaah, JAS sexaay ah!". hehehe. i cant log in to e-blaze uh, DAMMIT! i wanna do my homework tau. but its okay. i have to go now. hope to upload pichas soon!! :]

love,
ain

last day of school

2009-05-30T00:41:00.004+08:00

hey. today was the last day of school and it was mundane. i did not find a need to be in school just now. i mean FREEEE periods then i can get my report book. walaowe, wa piang eh! haha. entah betul ke tak whatever im writing now. anyway, yeah, mid-years was a breeze. and khairul cursed me that for prelims that i'll not do well. kurang asamnye budak! btw, i had a mini excursion to madrasah aljunied. i was shocked when i saw the road name; JALAN KUBOR! i mean waddaheck gitu kan. then i learnt that there's a kubur near there. anyway, it was okay and it was the first time daniel saw me wearing tudung. he must have a thought that i looked so sweet in the headscarf. nyahahaa. i was thinking a lot today. im tired of the same old guys who kept cheating on me, NONSTOP. im too tired to think about this anymore. i just want someone new who understands me well and just not cheat on me. ive had enough of this shit and i just want everything to stop. anyway, june hols are here but for the first two weeks i have school! i love going to school. i really have to study like hell during this june hols cos there are not much time left to mug for Os. anyway, i heard sth about this 'EXPRESS STREAM' guy. he is a total idiot uh by saying that the EXPRESS students confirmed could get their As for their Malay but can the sec5[NA] students get their As? as an EXPRESS student before, i feel so sad for the sec5s as they were looked down upon. to me, we are all human beings with the same BRAIN. that guy just doesnt have a brain lah.whatever lah eh. BTW, for ppl taking MT Os, i just wanna wish you guys manymany LUCK! think of MT Os as a very "CHICKEN-FEET" exam, okay. gotta go now. GDNITE!

2009-05-27T23:37:00.003+08:00

hello peepos.
m, naja's birthday was celebrated with a simple suprise. it was a collaboration with the guys named nafis, fahmi and pet. m, i was estatic to see nafis lah. dah lama bener enggak ku ketemu sama si dia. gwe amat rindu banget sama dia loh. okay, haha.
anyway, when maisarah did something for iskandar cos todays their anniv, im reminded of nafis and I. cos today is my anniv if i was still with him. we recently contacted each other back again. and boy, he looks and seems different. but different2 macam mana pun, its good for him uh. just remembered something about the guy i blogged about. i asked khalee if she saw him these past few days as they lived quite near to each other. she said she saw him with two diff girls in two diff days. siallah, BASTARD gila punye budak. sorry ah i feel like becoming a MINAH in this post, no offence. he senang2 played with my feelings, he senang2 played with me and then he senang2 leave me. BABI ah, really ah. cannot stand it. WARNING: To a new guy that will step into my life in the future, if you do these kind of things, i CONFIRM PLUS CHOP wont trust guys to the MAX anymore. really BABI punye anak ah tu! im angry.
haha, ok betul2 angry nampak? hm, takdelah. org2 mcm tu patut dikutuk rabak ah.full stop.

ain

update on ytd's blog

2009-05-19T22:25:00.004+08:00

so as i mentioned to sufi that i'll be updating on ytd's post, here it goes...
m, so yeah back to the guy.

well i sent a last text message to him in the afternoon. all i could summarise is that "if its meant to be, then its meant to be. if its not, then lets just leave it at that.". he said he was sorry. i felt that his apology was sincere. then, when night falls, he texted me saying that 'he's a bad guy.'. its like he said the opposites of the both of us. i mean yeah, its a lot of opposites but when he said something different, i was completely stunned. i could not believe it. so its like over between me and him. i was sad at first but looking at it again, i know it wasn't going to happen. i wished him luck for his future. i'll definitely miss him! :'[

next up, is my MYE scores. like ohmygosh, i improved tremendously!!!! so here goes :

ENGLISH-C5 (well my english grades have been like this since last year. NEVER IMPROVED!)

MATH-A2 (OMG! i could not believe my ears and eyes seeing my good score! im working hard all d way!!)

COMB. SCI [PHY/CHEM]-C5 (somehow i "deproved" for this paper. physics fail, chem pass! what is this?!)

COMB. HUMANS. [SS/HIST]-A1 (okay, done super well for this paper. gonna work super hard to maintain dat!)

POA-B3 (thanks to khalee and my POA notebook, ive done well for this paper. 2nd highest in class! :] )

tons of pictures will be published soon. but here's one to see how "pretty" i look like nowadays. haha, ok joking. :p

love,

ain

2009

2009-05-18T20:51:00.004+08:00

hey. confirm plus chop i have too many stories too say.
firstly, lets talk about my guy k.
well, i recently contacted a guy from my former primary school.
he's a very chinese-y look kindaof guy which i LOIKE. heehee.
he did confessed about his feelings towards me after a month. and it all seems too perfect to be true. but recently, he had this problem which he can't further clarify with me. and after that, he somehow stopped contacting me. after further questioning, i can sense that his feelings for me had fade away. he said i didnt take care of him well, that was why. i felt super sad and this has really made me a girl who won't trust guys anymore that easily. what with their promising words and my trust in them, this just makes me feel me more depressed than ever. i'm gonna try my best to stop trusting guys! but in fact, i reallyreallyreally love him. maybe its just not meant to be.
secondly, about my family. i am so scared of BROKEN family. my mom and her siblings are like on a rivalry. when i put myself in my mom's shoes, i could feel her utter sadness. could you imagine being the big sister, all your siblings are talking bad about you and spreading rumours about your children? and imagine being a mom with that case, your children won't even help a bit to lighten your burden? and that you're almost 50 and you're still working so hard to support the family? i cried for all these many problems. i guess it's difficult to set up a family afterall so now, i have to be more understanding. no more talking back towards my mom NOW!
thirdly, i'll try to post pictures starting from this year onwards. haha. my dad just gave me the USB for the camera. waddaheck.
OHYA BFORE I FORGOT! i got my english and history paper just now. english was quite badly done. my compre fail but my summary pass with flying colours, heehee. ok so the compre part was 8/25 and my summary was 19/25. so my english P2 marks is 27/50. the interesting part is my history paper. waaaaaaah, i shock kemama sia! didnt expect my score to be super high! first time seh i got 42/50 for history. i mean whatthehell was i doing last year. i could have score! anyways, tmr will be the day where i get all my papers back. hope i will score everything!! wish me luck once again. toodles.

love,
ain

depression

2009-04-11T00:47:00.003+08:00

i admit im having depression. for goodness sake, i started to think about dying. i have been thinking of dying since last year. i dont know why. you guys might think i have a perfect fairytale story in my life, but never okay.
my symptoms of depression:
- a change in appetite, with significant weight loss or weight gain
- a change in sleeping patterns, such as difficulty sleeping, early morning awakening, or sleeping too much
-constant feelings of sadness, irritability, or tension
-restlessness or feeling slowed down
-decreased ability to make decisions or concentrate
-feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, or guilt
-thoughts of suicide or death

im scared. i dont find people loving me or care for me. im really scared to be alone. i always blame the operation. i find myself ugly inside and outside. i dont know whats happening to me. im really, really scared. i kept crying this days. i might just die in the room alone one day w/o no one noticing me. i aint perfect, i am never too perfect for anyone. i dont know what to do. i need friends. i need my whole family behind me. i need someone. he could be counsellor or a doctor maybe. but for goodness sake, im scared of hurting myself though i want to die. :(

2009-04-02T18:31:00.003+08:00

hey.
i am super irritated by this woman. i kept seeing her every single morning. and she's one super weird chinese lady. she would wear sports attire- shirt and long track pants with sports shoe. know what she does that irritated me so much? she takes out her camera and either takes video or pictures of the surroundings. i dont't get it. it's bugging me so much that i feel like venting out my anger on her. i mean what's up with her man? its either she's crazy or too excited to take pictures or video about people. for goodness sake, i saw her at yewtee just now. she still did the same thing. and i was confirmed that she was doing something with her camera to capture people's faces. eh really, ni boleh mendatangkan kemarahan!!
anyways, im gonna start my math tuition tomorrow. for 2 hours, im gonna learn math. gosh, so excited!!!! haha.
btw, syafiq is super cool and funny. haha. ok so random...
im trying to prevent myself from going out with friends. hence, i'll be stuck at home for the rest of my life till mid-november. hehe. don't miss me too much. haha.
ok gotta go now. take care peeple. gdnite!

love,
ain

2009-03-16T23:10:00.003+08:00

hey.
today was FUNFUNFUN! haha.
i studied with khalee at my house.
then the girls [ira, ana, azah, natt and elly] went to my house around 3pm.
i invited them over for a movie marathon as my parents weren't in.
it was super funny and scary at the same time.
we watched 2 indonesian horror movies.
gawd, i swear i can't bring azah to watch horror movies. banyak punya comment itu anak. hehe.
ok i wanna start typing in indon. here it goes...

jadi lepas lihat cerita-cerita hantu itu, aku ajak athirah sama ana untuk makan malam sama aku di luar. kita terus pergi ke LOT ONE. ya kok, ramai benar orang yang ku ketemu tadi. kita makan dan omong-omong kosong di FOOD CULTURE. lama benar kita di sana. kita terserempak sama hana dgn pacarnya. kiut banget gitu loh. terusan, kita pergi ke pasar malam. kita terserempak sama hariz, yanna dan aji tapi kita enggak make 'eye contact' gitu loh. esok mama dan papa gwe sama nana akan pulang. gwe rasa senang sekali mereka mau pulang.

haha, okay stop it seh. i gotta go now. gdbye ppl! :]

love,
ain

sch hols

2009-03-13T16:29:00.003+08:00

heyheyhey.
gawd, CHIPMUNK's back on the radio!!
you guys should like totally listen to RIA fm. chipmunk's super duper cute!
anyways, i went jogging ytd with elly. then, i saw zuhaili somewhere near elly's block. i was like "wth is he doing here?". BUT then, i saw some regenites with him whom i won't specify here. he didn't even see me lar seh. guess i oughta put the past like way, way behind me.

" thanks eliana for the fries,
thanks ana for the pasta and pizza; and
thanks naja for the mcdonald's meal. "

" sorry eliana,
sorry ana; and
sorry naja ."

i just realise something about myself.
i like to make things difficult for others. it's like a habit.
i don't know how to change that habit. i just wanna kick off that habit.
maybe i have an attitude problem? i don't know.
i'm sorry if i hurt anyone, yet again.

BTW, today is like friday the 13th whereby it's the last day of school[which means the sch hols are here! like finally!!!!] and then there's my madrasah; and the day where i got my report book.
i can't believe it! i got a 19 for L1B4! i have never ever get that kind of points before. this is a good start for my O Levels, so that I can gauge my weak and strong subjects. this hols i'm planning a lot of stuffs. super-duper excited! ok, sunday to tuesday, my parents and nana go MELAKA!!!! and i'm like so going to partaaaay!!!haha.

SUNDAY - either going out with elly to support her friend who will be dancing OR
- dating [the guy's a dancer too!]
MONDAY - study with khalee and naja at my house then, have a movie marathon with girlfriends.
TUESDAY - stay at home and be a good bitch.
WEDNESDAY - class outing at spore botanical gardens
THURSDAY - stay at home, self-revision.
FRIDAY - POA lesson at 10am , go madrasah if there's one.
SATURDAY - go watch 'danceworks' at vivo. [maybe!]

so that's my plan for school hols. haha. ok then, gotta go. will update if i have time. :]

love,
ain

2009-02-23T18:16:00.006+08:00

hello peeple.
i know..i know, it's been a month since i blogged.
well, i solved my problem and i'm busy as a bee.
okay, so you guys know i flopped in my O's.
and hence, i decided to retake my O Levels in school.
at first, school was a bit mundane. i did not manage to adapt to my class.
i felt like an outcast that time. but by then, things began to work out in my class.
i began to feel at ease and learning was a breeze. to tell you the truth, i find myself more hardworking and determined to do well. if only, i was like that last year. things would then turn out differently then.
however so, it doesn't matter as i'm gonna ace my O's this time round. my buddies in school are NAJA and KHALEEDA! they are great students and friends, i tell you. naja can be so NERDY but BRAINY at the same time. khalee is so CLEVER yet DEAF. funny kan? haha.
i did my science, english and social studies common test last week. science was not bad, kindaof the 5th in class. and for english, i don't even know how i can be the top in class. there was not even enough time during the english test and i wrote super-little details. but even as the top in class, i got a just above average marks.[which doesn't make any sense on how i can be the highest in class]
but i feel that my classmates dislike me for getting those kind of scores. whatever it is, i know i just wanna do well for every tests and exams. no more slacking for me!
thanks for the taggies, peeple. syam, thanks for the tag. really appreciate it. i talked to all adults and i solve my O level problem.
OMG!! just remembered something. i saw "ZULILY"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
he had this dyed mohawk hair and i find that so cute. haha
okay, well this ZULILY is my first BF. i saw him last friday. i sat with him and we talked openly about our lives. turns out that he is single [HINT:must be finding for a girl now! i got chance!!haha.]. and i am single! like what the hell. hm, so anyways, he gave me signs of wanting me back. but i didn't say anything lah seh. i was shocked when i saw him. like i don't know what to expect or what to talk about with him. i left that place and was just left with his email address. goddamnit, we didn't exchange numbers. i guess i miss him a lot but, i dont know about him though.
gotta go now. wanna eat my dinner and gotta prepare for my math common test tomorrow.
goodbye. when i'm super-free, i'll blog yea. :]

love,
ain

2009-01-13T13:15:00.003+08:00

hey.
guess i flopped on my o levels.
i have to make quick decisions either moving on or to take a step backward.
i can't even decide myself on what is my next plan.
i am super sad on my dad's reaction.
he was so disappointed that he did not even wanna discuss anything with me.
it feels that he is putting all the blame on me. guess im his greatest disappointment in his life?
it's true what my teacher said that even if i cry so much, nothing will ever change at all.
but the problem is, if i talk about it, i tend to cry. i just dont know how to stop the crying.
my mom was calm and even supported me in any way. she said if i have to take the longer route, its okay cos' i will still get there sooner or later. but for now, im just not sure myself.
everyone seems to have make their plans or even have applied for JAE.
i will apply for JAE tonight or either, tomorrow morning. this is just the beginning for me.

“..Yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery.

But today is a gift, that is why they call it present..”

- Master Oogway from Kung Fu Panda

love,

ain

upcoming o level results!

2009-01-11T22:35:00.004+08:00

hey. i am super nervous and scared plus excited to get my O Level results. i wonder what will i really get after slacking for it. just hope to get below 25, maximum.in about 16 hrs and 20 minutes, everything will be revealed. btw, im gonna make a new blog soon so just wait for my tags at your bloggies kay. gotta have my beauty sleep now, so TOODLES!! :]

2009-01-04T14:33:00.002+08:00

hey. currently will be renovating my blog. so won't be posting anything yet.
anyway, just pop in to henderson waves the other day on 30 dec. FUN!
gonna go out with ana and elly soon to henderson waves again!!! i love the place.

love,
ain

2008-12-24T12:06:00.000+08:00

i was disturbed by passerby's comments.
i mean why don't you put your real name cos' i think its better if you do put your name.
whoever you are, i admit they did bring colours into my life.
but didn't they fade the colours out of my life when they left me?
well fyi, i'm not a part of their life anymore.
they are having their great lives themselves, so if you think i'm having so much fun in my life, you're wrong.
i have been living my life by myself, alone.
i have never felt so strong in my life that i can live on my own.
i just want my girlfriends back even though i know i can't.
if she misses me like hell, why won't she do anything to make it up back to me?
whoever she is and whoever passerby is, i just hope i'm making some sense in your head.
take care.

2008-12-22T17:30:00.000+08:00

Minta maaf banyak-banyak tidak dapat untuk meng-update blog...
[THE REASON: I was sick for 1 week and 3 days due to food poisoning!]
I have never felt so sick before in my whole life.
Luckily I didn't get to the other side of the world. hehe, just joking.
I have so much to tell but as usual, no time.
Time is so precious, you know? teehee.
Hence of my sickness, I didn't get to celebrate Shazana's birthday and Farid + Elly's birthday celebration. Despite of me being sick, there is always a blessing in disguise.
Ana, Elly, Radi and riverside ppl were there for me when I was sick.
I felt super better with their caring for me.
I met up with Ana, Farid, Syazwan, Khairul and another guy on 20 dec for pool and dinner.
It was a relaxing, funny and fun thing that day. Hope to meet them again soon!
Ana just started working last week. She's gonna have money soon, unlike me.
It's too late for me to get employed this month. Maybe, January? hehe.
Went out with family yesterday. My mom wanted to treat us to lunch at Sakura.
Then, we went to buy my big sister's birthday present. We bought her a black GUESS wallet. It was on SALE!
It was worth it. Then, my mom saw another black shiny GUESS wallet which caught her eye. At last, we bought 2 wallets with an extra 10% off. So the worth it, you know? haha.
I bought a LEVI's straight cut jeans. My small sister bought a pink sports shoe.
Always pink lah that girl! But so tak feminine at all. Nana likes to dress up like a boy-shirt with jeans and sneakers. That is her typical outfit. So never ever buy for her a skirt or dress, it will be so wasted on her.
I don't know why I have a small sister who dresses like a boy. Funny lah she! hehe.
Anyway, I might be having a date this week. I just hope it will turn out right on the day itself.
So, if there's anything to be updated, I will blog soon alright?
oh ya, I'm planning to celebrate New Year together with friends. So if many could make it, I will confirm it here soon. Take care, peeple. I'm off to be fit and healthy this month. :]

love,
ain

GOING TO KL TRIP!

2008-11-27T00:32:00.001+08:00

hey, im feeling very down right now.
dealing with a loss of a friend (he didnt die okay?) and im going to KL in a few hours time.
im too sad that im gonna leave Singapore today. i cant believe it.
i was spose to go KL on friday, but then plans changed so yea. im leaving everything behind today, and looking forward to a new life.
before i go, im sorry if i did anything wrong to u guys.
gdnite everyone! :]

redcamp 5 pics

2008-11-24T12:59:00.000+08:00

redcamp

2008-11-24T12:34:00.001+08:00

hey peeple.
REDCAMP 5 was the BOMB!
from 19 nov-21 nov, i was letting my hair down at the camp sia.
i had fun overall. with the hip-hop dancing to the tours around Ngee Ann Poly and to the ZOUK thing. i had 3 superb days with the whole NINJA clan. well, NINJA won for the 1st day. on the last day, we were announced as the WILDEST TRIBE! i shouted like hell for the 3 days and i still haven't lose my voice. how irritating is that!? haha.
there were many SLs who were gerek kakis. i love all the SLs. and the cheers are still stuck in my head since. and i made many new friends.
will a mention a few here-SYARIF,SYAZWAN,FARID,RADI,SHARIFAH,
MASTURA,MAISURAH,DANIEL(St. Gabriel guy),KIERAN,RAVIN,SAIFUL.
im sorry if i didnt mention some friends here, terlupa ah. :]

*im happy for ana and someone. they are compatible. he's a gentleman, ana. grab him before other girls want him. wish you guys the very best yea. *

till now, i dont feel like having to do anything with guys. the more i know guys, i felt that they hurt me more. i dont know whats wrong ah. but just an advice to guys, dont contact 2 girls at the same time. it could hurt both parties. i got to know 2 stories like this recently. it really hurts me that girls always have to be the victims of unappreciative guys. whatever it is, im living this life as a normal girl.

anyway, i went to BOOKFEST just to see TAUFIK BATISAH!!! he is HOT to the MAXX!
i dont know why i was so fanatic that i even bought the new album just to get his autograph and to take picture with him. will upload the pics soon. but for now, i have only a few REDCAMP 5 pictures.
TOODLES!

love,
ain

christianisation

2008-11-14T00:39:00.000+08:00

will be updating later on christianisation! :]

i find that it is an interesting topic to share with everyone here.

*WARNING!You guys will find yourself tangled with your life and your beliefs.*

life is not what it seems

2008-11-13T23:40:00.000+08:00

hey.
wanna update on something that i just realise about my life.
my life as i know for 16 years is one rollercoaster ride.
it had not been better and neither had it been any worse.
i felt suicidal recently, due to just some minor stuffs.
but i am not gonna post some 'EMO-SHITS' down here, aight?
no worries. :]
well, i thought that being 16 is the most wonderful thing to experience.
everyone who read this might be 16 or even, less or more than 16.
everyone will go through this age whereby everything will change so much, that you will find yourself twisting your life. and i mean, really TWIST.
everyone make mistakes and you can never find a person who doesn't.
i expected life to be much more clearer and better, but what i am experiencing right now is something much more dull and not better.
i am sorry if i am gonna hurt anyone here kay.

hmm. i felt that i am too naive/gullible to everyone.
i just could not bring myself to trust anyone anymore, after what that has happened this year.
i found myself, sometimes, trapped in the past.
i wanted to forget about my EX but then, he came back to me this year.
i didn't know what to expect from him.
i was blinded by L-O-V-E. then, after the usual contacting each other, i found myself contacting a totally different EX. he's changed so much. i even felt that he was just playing with my feelings. i could not bring myself to contact him anymore(it's been 2 days already!). i felt threatened by his presence and i was pressurised by the thought of a third party. guess we're just not meant to be yea? :]
i also thought that as the sec-four year is coming to an end, everyone will be super-close to each other.
it didn't happen to me though. had two fights with two group of friends this year. i even felt that i did not even existed in the two friendships. i was an invincible figure in the whole misunderstanding.
i said i was sorry but no one heard how sorry i was for myself. i miss NAJA, IRA, AMEE and LULU.
i hope that time will stop so that i can re-build this friendship to be strong once again.
then, i found out that i am trapped in the past again.
i'm not saying that my friends change but, it's just that i want to see the old NAJA, IRA, AMEE and LULU.
where we all will hangout and laugh till our throats get very dry. sadly to say, i can't make people change for me and neither will i ask them to change. i just want a simple request from you guys that we will make damn sure that we will hangout more in the future.
and to ANA, i treasure this friendship more and more after every meet-ups and sharing of stories.hehe.
i just want to tell you how happy i have been being with you. you were there for me when everything and everyone left. i am so thankful to GOD that i have you as a friend. i assure you that i will never let you down.
ANA, just know that i will be gladly there for you. anytime and anywhere! :]

anyways, i have been having this migraines in the evening. and sometimes, i feel like throwing up.
gosh, i feel like the sickest person in Singapore. hehe.
AND! there have been these 3 days which i wanted to collect my passport at ICA with my mom.
the first one, my mom said she was too lazy to go out. the second one, it was too late already as the passport collection closes at 4.30pm. and the third one which was TODAY (13 NOV) did happen. BUT my mom didn't ask me to bring my IC along. thus, it was a wasted trip there. and the fourth one will happen TMR (14 NOV). must DIE-DIE take my passport tmr! haha.
okay, i will stop this non-stop, long and draggy post for now.GOODNIGHT PPL!

love,
ain
[0035am]

hari raya pics!

2008-11-12T12:15:00.000+08:00

pics.

2008-11-06T12:25:00.000+08:00

new day for me....

2008-11-05T15:18:00.000+08:00

hey peeple.
like ohmygosh, o levels will end soon.
like next week on the 11th of november.like hello?...
hha.gosh i sound like a bimbo.hehe. :]
i've been feeling so the happy goober u know?
ana says that i was very bubbly+mentel ytd.is that spose to be good or not?
hmm, anyways.. i have this strong feeling in me that i'm so gonna fail POA and Math.the negative thoughts started this week or so.but however so, I have back-up plans after the O Levels result are released.
uhm, and ya on the 11th of nov, Im gonna jolly-jolly to the max.
i have two dates on that day!! haha. MENTEL-LANS!! :P
the first date will be with my BF. and then, the second date will be with my friend. hehehs. jangan banyak tanye ok who's who..
tengok movie cerita hantu.nyehehe!haha.
well its best to watch horror movie with a guy. girls, if you know what i mean.
guys, dont take advantage eh. haahaa.
eh, later i'll update u on hari raya pics with the gang.hee.
hm, well i got to contact back with NAF but i dont think we're gonna go into rship or anything. so dont assume by looking at the pics ok?
NAF changed a lot.he wasn't the same guy i knew before. and i guess, he contacted me back bcos he's feeling lonely after the break-up. i was not expecting him to come back to me, too.cos i thought his rship with her will last as i knew they really love each other. but again, ppl change.
talking about ppl changing, let me give advice to u ppl.
DONT EVER CHANGE FOR YOUR LOVED ONES!
*except for attitude* but dont ever change the way u look or anything for someone else. and dont ask someone to change for u, unless their attitude really sucks to the max. this is my own personal experience.
i was really mad when that someone asked me to change the way i look and the clothes i wear. to me, it was plain rude. but we talked about it, and i guess we're okay now.
hmm, I'll admit to u guys that i have a BF named ANA! dont be shock.
we've been seeing each other like almost everyday.[NON-STOP HITS!]
hha.and i got to know this guy named HZQ.he is a great guy friend.
and ya, SHAHIDDIN.my really greatest guy friend!i hope 6 NOV will work out just fine between me and him.
DAAAN, jangan lupa FAUZI. itu confirm2 BF aku.haha. ira, jgn jealous yea.haha just kidding. but yaa, he is my best friend in sch and madrasah.
okay that's it for now. ohya, i almost forgot.
im going to be a malaysian citizen at the end of NOV. will be going to KL for holiday.i really can't wait... [JUMPING UP AND DOWN LIKE A MONKEY!]
hehe. okay toodles.

love,
ain

friends

2008-09-04T11:28:00.000+08:00

hey.i just read something very interesting on this blog.
this advice will really help me in dealing with conflicts throughout my life.
i hope you guys read it and absorb it in your mind.

"In any kind of relationship (such as with friends, parents and siblings), misunderstandings are bound to happen. The key to strengthening relationships, despite the arguments and conflicts is good communication.

And remember, HUMILITY helps in settling arguments. Do not be defensive and think the other person is attacking you when they are talking about how they feel. It is, in fact, how they feel. Allow them to tell you how they are feeling - Be humble enough to listen. Seek
to compromise.

Do not be arrogant and keep saying you are not at fault or blame the other person that they are faulting you when in fact, they are telling you how they are feeling. If you treasure your relationship and want to improve it, there is definitely no room for arrogance.
(arrogance: offensive display of superiority or self-importance; overbearing pride)"

How To Communicate: Improve Your Relationships With Effective Communication Skills
This article is borrowed from http://stress.about.com/od/relationships/ht/healthycomm.htm
Written by Elizabeth Scott, M.S..

Conflict in a relationship is virtually inevitable. In itself, conflict isn’t a problem; how it’s handled, however, can bring people together or tear them apart. Poor communication, disagreements and misunderstandings can be a source of anger and distance, or a springboard to a stronger relationship and happier future. Next time you’re dealing with conflict, keep these effective communication tips in mind and you can create a more positive outcome.
Difficulty: Average
Time Required: Just a little extra time.

Here's How:

1. Stay Focused: Sometimes it’s tempting to bring up past seemingly related conflicts when dealing with current ones. Unfortunately, this often clouds the issue and makes finding mutual understanding and a solution to the current issue less likely, and makes the whole discussion more taxing and even confusing. Try not to bring up past hurts or other topics. Stay focused on the present, your feelings, understanding one another and finding a solution.

2. Listen Carefully: People often think they’re listening, but are really thinking about what they’re going to say next when the other person stops talking. While it might be difficult, try really listening to what your partner is saying. Don’t interrupt. Don’t get defensive. Just hear them and reflect back what they’re saying so they know you’ve heard. Then you’ll understand them better and they’ll be more willing to listen to you.

3. Try To See Their Point of View: In a conflict, most of us primarily want to feel heard and understood. We talk a lot about our point of view to get the other person to see things our way. Ironically, if we all do this all the time, there’s little focus on the other person’s point of view, and nobody feels understood. Try to see the other side, and then you can better explain yours. Others will more likely be willing to listen if they feel heard.

4. Respond to Criticism with Empathy: When someone comes at you with criticism, it’s easy to feel that they’re wrong, and get defensive. While criticism is hard to hear, and often exaggerated or colored by the other person’s emotions, it’s important to listen for the other person’s pain and respond with empathy for their feelings. Also, look for what’s true in what they’re saying; that can be valuable information for you.

5. Own What’s Yours: Realize that personal responsibility is a strength, not a weakness, and admit when you’re wrong. If you both share some responsibility in a conflict (which is usually the case), look for and admit to what’s yours. It diffuses the situation, sets a good example, and shows maturity. It also often inspires the other person to respond in kind, leading you both closer to mutual understanding and a solution.

6. Use “I” Messages: Rather than saying things like, “You really messed up here,” begin statements with “I”, and make them about yourself and your feelings, like, “I feel frustrated when this happens.” It’s less accusatory, sparks less defensiveness, and helps the other person understand your point of view rather than feeling attacked.

7. Look for Compromise Instead of trying to ‘win’ the argument, look for solutions that meet everybody’s needs. Either compromise, or a new solution that gives you both what you want most, this focus is much more effective than one person getting what they want at the other’s expense.

8. Take a Time-Out: Sometimes tempers get heated and it’s just too difficult to continue a discussion without it becoming an argument or a fight. If you feel yourself or your partner starting to get too angry to be constructive, or showing some destructive communication patterns, it’s okay to take a break from the discussion until you both cool off. Sometimes good communication means knowing when to take a break.

9. Don’t Give Up: While taking a break from the discussion is sometimes a good idea, always come back to it. If you both approach the situation with a constructive attitude, mutual respect, and a willingness to see the other’s point of view or at least find a solution, you can make progress toward the goal of a resolution to the conflict. Unless it’s time to give up on the relationship, don’t give up on communication.

10. Ask For Help If You Need It: If one or both of you has trouble staying respectful during conflict, or if you’ve tried resolving conflict with your partner on your own and the situation just doesn’t seem to be improving, you might benefit from a few sessions with a therapist. Couples counseling or family therapy can provide help with altercations and teach skills to resolve future conflict. If your partner doesn’t want to go, you can still often benefit from going alone.

Tips:

1. Remember that the goal of effective communication skills should be mutual understanding and finding a solution that pleases both parties, not ‘winning’ the argument or ‘being right’.

2. This doesn’t work in every situation, but sometimes (if you’re having a conflict in a romantic relationship) it helps to hold hands or stay physically connected as you talk. This can remind you that you still care about each other and generally support one another.

3. Keep in mind that it’s important to remain respectful of the other person, even if you don’t like their actions.

love,
ain

long time no see

2008-08-29T18:40:00.001+08:00

hey peeps.
sorry for not updating my summer-goddess bloggie.haha.
life's turning upside down for me. i feel like a lost ugly duckling. totally lost!
everything's been moving too fast and i am the only one running in the neverending race. :[
i feel so small in this world, that i am scared that i will never ever live like a normal person.
friends, the most precious and dearest creatures, turned away from me; from time to time.
what was an unperfect girl like me to do? sigh.
i know that they are singing a different tune than me.
well, i guess i know everything now. i hate being HATED!
how can i not when there are quite a few hating me? i feel so demoralised.
i dont even have the mood to revise for upcoming prelims and O Levels.
im not pointing any fingers to anyone, neither will i be judgemental.
cant we just be friends anymore? is it so difficult to avoid all this small arguments?
i will find a way somehow to solve this problems. i hope that everything will work out well.
on the other hand, HAPPY TEACHERS DAY to all teachers over the world! :B

♥ Ms Chew, I wish you all the best for your new baby boy [JEROME] and Im really hoping to see you again. The whole class misses you so much.We promise to do our best for prelims and O Levels!! I love you, Ms Chew!!!!!!! HAPPY TEACHERS DAY! :B

Elly, ana and me did our special project for ms chew's teachers day gift. i really love the idea of being together!
Teacher's Day concert today was so COCK-UP! i was totally kindaof fed-up.
El Bino and Simple Notecase was totally awesome. they really rock the stage. haha.
i love those two bands. haha. but El Bino still can be improved. hee.
we also had our Be Yourself Day today! that was the first time we had that event in our school. i love it, somehow.
there was a lot of pictures taken. so i will post it if i have the time yea. :]

THE BEST PART OF TODAY----saw Zuhaili [SCREAMS]!!! , spending time with few friends, and phototaking.
THE WORST PART OF TODAY----Teacher's Day concert, saw my ex-BF with his GF, and not spending time with my other halves.

zuhaili was so hip-hoppity! i loike. haha. its been a long time since i saw him.
he did shout my name but with my shyness, i did not turn to him and said a HELLO. so sad...
I MISS HIM LIKE ALOT CAN?! he seems a bit more taller and muscular which i really like. haha again.
well when i saw my ex-BF, i almost cried but i kept my tears in. HE took HER home.
i was shocked with HIS appearance. i have to move on, i suppose. ;[
ok then, will update the blog soon if i can. goodbye!

love,
ain

2008-07-23T23:22:00.000+08:00

i have this mood swings all of a sudden.
i cant believe it for once more in my life, friends come and go.
i dont know what to do or believe,really.
im just going with the flow of life of being a 16 yr old teenager.
im just gonna put everything aside and will open up those problems after BIG O's.

*I WANT TO BE TEACHER'S DAY EMCEE!!!!!*

love,
ain

RHD pics!!!

2008-07-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

RACIAL HARMONY DAY PICTURES!!!!!!

*spot me! *

love,
ain

Pictures!

2008-07-19T23:35:00.000+08:00

baru nak update!

2008-07-19T23:08:00.000+08:00

my dearest blog.
im sorry for not updating you, my dear gizmo.
once again, so much things has happened, and im still the old person you know.
nothing will ever change the fact that i am ME!
well on a happier note, i am beginning to open my eyes to see the real world.
i have new good friends, new hope and new goals to fulfil.
nothing can ever change that, too.
i had a few small little study group with my monsta, ELLY!
she's a joyful little monsta. :B
i thank God to have create a nice little creature to be my friend.
she's great, i tell you...haha!
uhm, Cultural Nite was SUPERDUPERGREAT! ^^_^^
i can see many transformations--from a schoolgirl/schoolboy to a maturedwoman/maturedman.
lovely bunch of people, dressing up smartly and nicely. :]
i can't help but teared, about how everything in secondary school life will end so soon.
however, things have to move on right?
[[homeworks+school revision papers=AIN-STEIN!]]
haha.ok, fauzi's favourite lame joke of me.
omg!i almost forgot to tell you guys that shahiddin will be in the same madrasah class as me.
WOW kan? fauzi totally love it! [Fauzi=GAYBOY]
Monday, 21st July 2008, is Racial Harmony Day!
i am SUPERDUPEREXCITED somehow?!
i wanted to wear Sari but then hor, no sari... so sad.
but then again, i mix and match my baju kurung to become the most fantastico baju ever!
taktau maluuuu....haha. O_O"
everything in my life will be perfect again soon, i hope.

"Friends are the biggest gems that is hard to find but yet when you find them, you find it easy to let them go."
---Nurul'Ain Bte Mohd Shah's words

love,
ain

2008-05-21T17:49:00.000+08:00

you know, sometimes i feel like shouting so loud to let go of all my unknown feelings.
i just wonder?how can people do this to me??
after my operation, people ran away from me as if im some monster or sth.
first, nafis.second, tedd.third, ira.then, amee.followed by, fauzi.
what did i even do in the first place?
maybe, some readers will say 'PADAN MUKE KAU!" to me.
i just dont know.really dont know.
well let me get the facts right.
*im not trying to badmouth you guys k*

to ira,
you had said to me before that you would really want to work our problems out.
but you didnt even talk to me in school. you tried to avoid wherever possible.
do you know how different and sad i was these past few weeks?
although you could see me laugh here and there, you just couldnt see my inner heart feelings.
maybe you felt normal to be having "new" few friends that could replace me.idk ira.
we have known each other for 4 years and maybe, still counting...
and you still dont know who i am. i thought i could count on you to give me some support due to our friendship problems.
we aren't small kids anymore, you know? [nak kawan, tanak kawan] is a big no-no to us already ok.
i gave you this bottle on our timeline of our friendship on your birthday this year. look at it properly and ask yourself whether you want our friendship to sink just like the "bead-made" boats.
im sorry if i seem to be putting all the blame on you. no, ira. i just want you to think about the words you said to me after all these years.
sorry again and i hope you will try to understand my situation here. :[

to amee,
you're just acting too weird for me.first, you will be smiling at me and the next, you're acting so cold at me.
i felt so confused by the way you act. sometimes,i dont even know whether i should talk to you.
maybe now you have feroz who could be replacing me? idk amee.
you have never shared your problems to me so idk what kind of problems you may be facing.
i know im not your type like hanging out with "cool" guy friends (i suppose), but asamatteroffact, it doesn't matter.
to think you would choose "THEM" over me after all these 4 years being friends? idk amee.
i still remember clearly in my mind on sunday for our ELDS outing.
to think again (once more), that you left all of us just to be with feroz.
i mean, hello!, aren't we suppose to be chilling with other ELDS members and remembering that we will graduate soon?
you said you were 'sorry' in your blog for 'ditching us'. well three people had defended you. good for you, amee!
maybe you weren't thinking of what your actions will do and how it hurt others due to your action?
choices have consequences, amee! you said you were sorry to me. what for?
after saying a 'sorry' word, you deliberately avoided me again at school. is that what people do when they said sorry to someone?
i guess that will be a 'no'!! where is thing called "kiss and makeup"? well amee, im not being harsh on you.
maybe you should change for the better, amee. im sorry if what i said really hurts you. idk what to do anymore, amee. :[

once again, maybe readers felt that im being harsh on them but see it is the only way to solve this friendship.
well do pray for me that everything will be just fine... :]

love,
ain

2008-05-01T00:23:00.000+08:00

arggghhh!!!

MYE for me, baybehh!

why oh why god?

2008-04-14T17:27:00.000+08:00

dearie bloggie,

school was as usual today.

nothing special...oh wait, i remember something.

fauzi brought chicken seaweed from home for me.haha.

sweet banget ya?!

he is just my guy friend, anyway.

mid years are two weeks from now.

so i won't be blogging here so frequent anymore again.

about the previous post, i don't want to be question about that yea.

im suppose to meet someone today, but that person ah cock-up dong.

but nvm...still can meet up that person sooner or later.

fnn coursework is due next monday.

i feel so nervous and scared to hand up that thingy.haha.

giving it to the monster is scary alright.

after o levels, i want to do a new friendster and bloggie.

i will revamp this two things like everyday after o levels.haha.

doesn't make any sense though.

my chinese drama at 5.30pm is starting soon. so ta-daa!

chioooooow.

love,

ain

friends?

2008-04-13T00:42:00.000+08:00

Dear blog,im sorry for not updating you these past few months.
to tell you the truth, my life is a complete mess right from A-Z.
i went to Natasha's bday party and Cikgu Salha's night bbq the past few months.they were a blast-just hanging out with my loved friends.
took a lot of pictures but, i can't seem to know where it goes.haha.
after those lovely outings, my life was going down the hill. :[
my main point of blogging today is to emphasise on the word 'friends'.
friends are companions who would share their joy, laughter and cry together.
but in my book, the word 'friends' doesnt even exist.
i have been misunderstood by many over and over again.
Do you know how rejected I am to see myself being neglected?
Do you know how I feel when friends just talk about me behind my back?
i can't hide my feelings. if you think i am talking about you, please do put some sense in your head.
try to put yourself in my shoes.not even try, just do it.
you eased my pain when i am in the hospital.
but when im not in the hospital, you contribute to the pain and try to make everything impossible for me.
i dont even understand why the hell you did it.
all the pains you caused have make me lost my confidence in me. the smiley me that i use to be everyday.
we've been friends for 4 years. why must you do what you did to me?
haven't i give you a sense of belonging, the caringness towards a friend and even smiles to brighten up your day?
if that was not enough, should i give my life instead?
as i sing the 'Graduation Day song' by Vitamin C during Award's Day on friday, i cried.
i cried so badly thinking about what we went through to still be friends.
i am even crying as i am typing this post now.i love to have friends, make friends and even to care, love and share things with friends.
but if this is what it means to have friends, i dont mind being an introvert instead.
i am willing to change the way i am for you, but are you willing to change for me?
people see me as a smiley person, but they dont know hurt and sad i feel inside.
i wish i died sooner or later. you wouldnt even care right?

let me say this to this guy,you dont need to be scared of me. im not a monster or anything. you should be scared of Allah swt instead.please stop saying negative stuffs about me.i thought you could be the best guy friend you would ever be, but you turned out to be differentthan what i expected you to be. i want you to remember me as the SUPERGIRL you knew me before. may God bless you.

to my friends,i am sorry for what ive done to you guys. i hope that we could be friends forever and i really mean it. why can't we just get along together? lets just put aside everything and talk from heart to heart. if you think that we should just break up this 4 years offriendship, i should just respect that and get along with life. im affected by what you said and it crumbles my heart to hear that. i really want us to be the way we were during the first year in school. may God bless you guys. thanks for being my finest friends.

love,
ain

camp!

2008-02-22T18:13:00.000+08:00

Good evening people! I just got home from camp and I am feeling the tiredness already. Don't forget a sleepyhead,too. So let me summarise the whole solid 3 days of our camp.

1st Day of Camp
We were lead by the "POWER" company which is Adam Khoo Learning Technology Group (AKLTG). Amirah and I were almost late in the morning. We bought the 2 bucks meal at MacD then we ran to school. I saw the various groups of camp instructors for each of the level in our school. The Sec 1s camped at school, the sec 2s camped somewhere near Changi, the sec 3s camped at Kluang, Malaysia and the sec 4s camped at Lim Chu Kang there. I was excited when I saw my friends, classmates and camp instructors. My class, 4/6, got PM Syam and PM Ben to be our Platoon Mentors(PM). We basically introduced ourselves to the PMs. The odd number people are in Platoon 11 which is PM Ben's and the even number people are in Platoon 12 which is PM Syam's. Unfortunately, Athirah was in Platoon 11. However, for all the games we played, we mostly did it as a class. The first thing we did was 'contacted'. We were supposed to be lying flat on the ground and our faces are supposed to be kissing the ground. Anyway, I didn't do much of the games because of my health problems. 'Contacted' comprises 'proning' too. Then, we proceed on to the '3 men lift'. We learnt this for First Aid purposes. 2 persons should make the safety chair and carry the casualty on their arms. After that, there was a 'piggyback' time! The next activity was 'slippery slope'. It looked fun, indeed. I did remember a part whereby Naja fell down when she was making the way down from the slope. The 'Jerry Can' race was the activity that challenges our mind. They jerry can which is filled up with water is supposed to be brought to another line. We played according to our platoons. Platoon 12, which is my group,won. Drills was also a part of our activities. I actually learnt how to march, how to positioned myself properly and the straight lines that we must formed. It was quite enjoyable! PM Syam taught us how to react if there is a grenade. We must actually run and prone. Next game, was 'ration transfer'.They formed a line to pass down the barrels until it reaches the last person and he/she must roll the barrel to the first person in front of the line. The cute part was when they roll the barrel to the front. haha. The other few games are camouflaging to the surroundings and caterpillar race. We did our 'Makan cheer' for dinner. We are supposed to prepare a skit, cheer, dance or sing for our CO night on the 2nd day of camp so, we discussed. We decided to do 'Billibanja' and singing of 'sunshine', 'Everybody dance now' claps and 'Via Bomb'! We had our Passing Out Parade (POP) at night. We were recruited to a Private(Pte) by the giving out of blue bandanas. Every class has their own colour of bandanas. We bathe at night in toilets that was quite squeezy. We got free sleeping bags! We finally slept at 12+ am. :]

2nd Day of Camp
My friends and I woke up at 4.45 am to bathe in the morning. My girls and I wore our class t-shirt. We did our Physical Training(PT). I was proud of Sec 4's Regenites as we broke the record of successful claps of a 1000. My hand was kindaof numb after that. We ate ration food for breakfast and lunch. We received an energy bar, a main course (i got Chicken Pongtay Rice) and cocoa biscuits. They tasted nice, indeed. We did our Victory March for our first activity that day. They gave us a map whereby we must find the road names and the name of the place. From there, we must crack the message which they jumbled the words and get the N.E. message. It was very tiring but everyone persevered, endured and determined to reach our target. After that, we had our lunch. Next activity was 'Great Raid'. The game was very challenging and tested our physical and mental state. We almost won but at last, we were only left with 1 island and 2 ships. haha. We had our drills for countless times and everyone put their 100% participation in it. Our CO night was fun and enjoyable. Every class had potentials in different segments of their performance. We did our thing as a class! I had fun performing in front of the audience. We had our last debrief that day. We also managed to find out PM Syam's real name which is Muhd Nur Hisyam.yeayeayeayea!!! The PMs shared ghost stories. PM Ivan is damn funny! His ghost stories was somehow turned into comedy instead. During lights off, my girls and I couldn't sleep so we joked around. :B

3rd Day of Camp
We had to packed our bags since it was the last day of camp. We did PT in the morning again. We broke the record again by doing 1700 successful claps. I am like so proud of myself.haha. We ate Nasi Lemak for breakfast. We did our area cleaning and 4/6 had to do the toilets. I was like "AGAIN?!". I have been doing toilets for the previous camps before. yeah man! We debrief for the lastlast time. I felt kindaof sad to know that we are gonna get separated from the PMs. Nat kept crying. It was very infectious. We were dismissed class by class. Encik John actually cried. I am very proud of him. I cried, too. PM Syam didn't want to send us back and I was sad. PM Ben sent us back to school. We took picture together with him. Then, I went home straightaway. I was feeling tired and sad. :[

Overall, the boot camp was a special camp for me! :D

love,
ain

V day + ytd...

2008-02-17T17:58:00.000+08:00

Valentine's Day was superb.having fun was what it's all about.i celebrated it with friends only.i was kindaof sad as i had celebrated this year alone.and to think i celebrated it at home, after school?gosh,sad kan?but i am most happy being single.haha.i made my whole class something.sweet kan?it took me 4-5 hours to make those 39 pretty little things.last 3 years in Regent, i didn't make for my whole class something so i felt it was time to do something for them.sweet to the max kan?anyways,i felt like a Santa Claus giving out those things.haha.in return,i got a lot of chocolates, sweets, cupcakes and muffins.i still have some left.while there was teaching in class, i felt bored and wrote on this notepad asking "What is Valentine's Day, people?". I just passed to some of my friends to put their comments.but to think, almost the whole class wrote their thoughts on the notepad.

amee: a day where people celebrate LOVE.
lulu: a day where people express their feelings for their loved ones and celebrate it as one. *loved ones refers to friends, family, etc. :)
ELLY: a day where people gives some LOVE♥ and care to other creatures! HAPPY V DAY♥
♥naja: a day when people get lovey-dovey and generous with gifts, nyahaha ♥__♥ (it was suppose to be a smiley smile!)
iranorris: "hearts are never distant" v' day- sincere love that doesn't have to be materialised, but shown with endless affection. happy v' day! it is also a day where the best of affections colour through. ♥xoxo, Ira
Farhana: A day where people show appreciation to those they love by giving presents. :) ♥
Shaz: a day where people show some love :D
Syafiqa: a day to celebrate love between friends, family and loved ones.
Azah: A day where people spread the love!
MeiYan: a day where we show and share our love. :)
LienChing: the day where love is expressed! I love everyone. :)
Grace: a day full with chocolates and candies. LOL.
Yaxin: The day when people express their loves to everyone! Also the day when the florist earns A LOT!
Junice: Hee, A lot of chocolate! So full! Hee...
Yeowheng: A happy day. :)
Ader: Er.... happy love day.
Hong Yi: A.... Holiday!!!
Jonathan: The day when fate arrange to meet their beloved. Lols.
Loh Wai Khee: A HAPPY Holiday!!! May all love wishes come true!!! :)

cute people aren't they? HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY ALL!

love,
ain

ira'sbday,sentosa-ing,ayah'sbday

2008-02-10T11:14:00.000+08:00

hayouyeyeiaa, PEOPLE!

it's been a week or so since i blogged.

therefore, i am gonna write down what 3 events that has took place this FEB.

1st EVENT-ira's birthday Happy 16th birthday,ira!!

ohmygosh.ira dah kakak-kakak seh...

wowwww!i can't believe that i am gonna be 16 too this year.
let's go and watch NC-16 movies,now!haha.

i am now making a speech to Miss Athirah Norris.

(clear my throat--ehem,ehem)

ASSALAMUALAIKUM.

ADAKAH AWAK YANG BERNAMA ATHIRAH NORRIS?

IRA: YA, SAYA ATHIRAH NORRIS.

BAGUS.SAYA INGIN MENGUCAPKAN SELAMAT HARI JADI YG KE 16.MINTA MAAF YANG BANYAK-BANYAK JIKA SAYA TELAH MELAKUKAN SALAH TERHADAP AWAK.DAN YANG PALING PENTING,SAYA SAYANG BANGET SAMA KAMU.

IRA: TERIMA KASIH YA! :D

anyways,we went out last saturday to celebrate her birthday at City Hall.we saw a lot of minahs and mats, as usual.me, naja and amirah surprised her with this Mrs Field's Brownie Cake that has an icing on top, which said "HAPPY SWEET 16,IRA!".mygod,we are so sweetkan??haha.athirah has the picture of the cake.i made her a present.it is this small container which I wrote happy birthday and stuffs, and taping neoprints of us on this beads like a boat.i am more sweetkan?hehe.overall,we were elated!we hangout at citilink and enjoyed our day.syazwan met us there.his friend,ajid,who came along is so cute.i likelike his teeth.haha.ajid and me were like the jokers of the day!gosh,i hope we can hangout again. :]

2nd EVENT-sentosa day

on thursday, the first day for CNY, my family and my relatives went to SENTOSA.ohya,HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!so knowing that beaches will be popular these few days,we went ahead with our plan.when we were at the sentosa station,my Uncle Rauzi and Auntie Maiza told us with their 'ISLANDER' card that they could enjoy many discounts.so i was like WOW!anyway,a long queue also had formed to enter the station.i mostly saw malays and indians and foreign tourists.firstly, we went to Imbiah Station.we wanted to take the rides first.the most special thing, was that there is this SENTOSA FLOWERS 2008.many flowers exhibition was displayed.it was a splendid sight,indeed!took alot of pictures there.we went to take the luge and skyride.so fun!the luge was this small car thingy where we rode it for about 650m.there is a special technique for braking and accelerating.the skyride is this thingy which you ride in the sky.haha.i am not a good descriptive writer.just look at the pictures later than you will understand.i took those rides for 3 times.fun and funny!the package was one ride for both the luge and skyride is 9 bucks.what they said was true,'once is never enough!'.haha.then, we went to siloso beach and hangout.i got sunburn.damn.my skin's peeling at my face.so geli and so sad. :[ for dinner, we went to Vivocity's Earle Swensens.my another Auntie belanja us.the kids including me got to eat the fries, 'Earthquake' and 'Chocolate Fondue'.it was superb!then,we headed home dragging our tired feets behind.

3rd EVENT-daddy's birthday

today is my dad's 46th birthday.may he be blessed this year with happiness and wealth.i am not sure if we are going out or not.but anyway, i haven't buy him any present.daddy, i love you! :D

so these 3 events has brought me to thinking that relationships between friends,relatives and family are very important.i hope you guys enjoy reading this!have a good day!

love,

ain

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2008-01-25T16:13:00.000+08:00

good afternoon people!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

sorry for the late New Year wish.

teehee.

i had a lot of things on my mind recently.

went back to school on the 7th of January.

brand new sec ones.brand new bag.brand new me.brand "new" friends.EVERYTHING was superb!

the shock of my life was to come back to school and receiving my FNN coursework question.

DEAL or NO DEAL?... haha. :D

Ms Chew is still my form teacher for 4/6. gosh, i lovelove her. She has been a great help since Day 1.and i think that she's pregnant! *chuckles*

O Levels??? it is in 8 or 9 more months to goooo. looking at yesterday's O Level 2007 graduates, i wasn't sure if i can make it or not. so much emotions spread all over the hall - tears of joy and also, tears of sadness. it was such a prestigious moment yesterday. i want to get a single-digit for my L1R4 and L1R5. that is my new year resolution!

mugging was a compulsory thing in my mind. had asked my dad for home tuition for my math, and sciences. i had also asked Kak Fyra to tutor me POA. i am so fucking weak in POA. athirah is totally dropping POA. i wanted to, but after considering all the consequences, i'ld rather not. i would need to train really hard to pass all the other 6 subjects, then. well. it's all in the mind.haha.

FNN coursework?will be finishing my TA(TASK ANALYSIS) and Research by this week.this repaired computer has been a great help!i can do all my FNN coursework at my own home instead of going to other people's house!i am prettypretty glad!! :D

homework has been piling up my table and so is, my handbook.i mean...my handbook is always full with the reminders,homeworks, and stuffs.crowded babe!!haha.teachers keep printing revision papers for us to try at home.teachers,teachers,teachers...they have been a great help.they are really working hard to help us in our subjects.i really respect and appreciate them.3 new teachers are Mr Song(PE cher), Mrs Sharon Tay(English cher) and Cikgu Salha(Malay cher).nicenice chers!

thats all now people.will blog in soon if i have the time.

ta-daa.

love and hate

2007-12-28T21:40:00.000+08:00

hey.i guess you guys have been wondering where have I gone to.hmm.im in such a difficult position to tell you guys.one,i have been telling you the laptop's down.two,i got hospitalised (dont ask me why) because of something.three,im starting to become a feminist.i am just so shocked+hatred when i look at this girl's friendster.he knows everything from a-z about me and now,he has a new girl.omg.pleeeeeeeeeeeaselaaaaah.i still am in love with you and what you did,has changed me.if only there's no guys in this world!im just so tired and sick of the word L-O-V-E.to naja,amee,ira,feroz,shazwan and shahid--thanks for suppporting me yeaa.we guys should hangout sometimes.i love you peeps.school's starting soon.students are starting to frust.and im gonna listen to my mp3.goodnight!

love,

ain

BIG NEWS!

2007-11-08T00:30:00.000+08:00

BIG NEWS!

SAW ZUHAILI AT LIMBANG MACD JUST NOW.

I TALK TO HIM TAU!!!!

he worked there as a "pengelap meja".

teeheee.

wanted to talk more to him, but then

he went to his friends instead.

he keeps teasing me abt being with faris.

puhh-lease!

when my friend went home,

i was still at macd.

sitting down.with the laptop infront of my eyes.

around 9.30pm,sudd he sat beside me.

drinking his green tea.

and with his black crumpler small bag.

he wanted to see what i was doing at the laptop.

i tugged at the laptop,somehow.hihi.

he was like so cute lah,can??

i miss him,kindaof.

naja wrote me a letter.

it was so sweet,felt like crying though.

hope everything goes well.

i even wonder if nafis still cares about me.

well i have shahiddin now!

haha.

but somehow,it seems that he dont wanna sms me.

i think i cant leave a day w/o him.

141107-HOT DATE!

i cant wait.can i?

haah.

miss you 3 GFs already.

get your schoolwork done,girls!

we have a lot of shopping and get-togethers this nov.

I LOVE YOU PEEPS!

gdbye peeps!

2007-10-25T15:09:00.000+08:00

i'm going somewhere for a long time.laptop's spoiled.am now using naja's comp at her house.nov,im going overseas.some knew about it.yea2.ok gdbye. :D

dammnnnnn

2007-10-02T20:00:00.000+08:00

i wonder how do you feel when your best friends totally ignored you?

i wonder why promises are meant to be broken?

i wonder why love makes people hurt?

i wonder why the people around me wants to leave me?

i wonder why the people we loved most will be the ones who will hurt you the most?

i wonder why life is getting tougher?

i wonder why no one can't see the agony and pain i'm going through?

i wonder why the people i'm usually not close with, are getting closer to me?

but i like that idea, though.

dammn.

i said i'm sorry everyone.

sorry if i hurt you guys too much.

but i have feelings too.

i thought she understands me the most?and i thought he understands me the most?

guess i don't understand them well.

gonna mug for physics now.physics paper is in one day's time.

GOODNIGHT!

and goodluck to 'N' Level people and people with exams coming up! :D

love,

ain

flirt

2007-09-28T21:18:00.000+08:00

wow.50 posts for my first blog.not bad at all.hee.
hmm.i'm like a total feminist now.

i don't even care to look at boys.

i don't even give a damn to cute,hunkie boys.

to me,they are just stupid bastards and freakos on the street.

well.ain knows how to take care of herself.

ahaa.i am so,so tired of rship with guys.

they suck at this.boo-ya!

dammn.

broke up with him today.

wonderful.such a wonderful moment.

he is totally changed.

i just can't seem to know him.what happen to that guy i knew?

Lord took that away from him.

away from me,infact.

where's that old him?dammn every guys.arghh.

mistakes he did : disrespecting me, rude language and a lot more which i do not want to disclose.

i thought he changed for the better but worser,mann!

i tried to blend in but he went overboard this time.

i can't i believe i did what i did.dump 2 guys,mann!

atleast, im free like a bird.haha.so proud of myself.

GIRL POWER!!!!! :D

shahid thinks im a desperado.yadayadayada.

if you do not want me to contact you,just say so.

u said it through my friend, for what?

cowards mann.speak up your mind,luhh.

"die sekejap ade,sekejap takde.mcm biskut seh,sekejap ade sekejap takde jugak."

fine lah guys,leave me then.

its hard to be friends with me.idk why.im so weird.

dammn.i just wanna kisskiss and makeup with everyone that I have sins with.

gahh.i dont even know how to feel right now.maybe i did the wrong thing?

well. from what i know,i want to start afresh and be the geekiest girl in school.

i saw zuhaili on my fav bike, the red one.

he is so cute and chubby.

i was talking to Ms Li that time.dammn.did not get the chance to say something.

i smiled only.he did smile too.i miss that smile.

he was with a girl.that girl was riding a bike,too.

dammn.he has a gf liao.and i just broke up.

alahhhhh.nvm,got secret weapon.haha.it's called the "OKS" plan.

you pronounce it as "OX".

hha.hope my friends know what that means.

ahaa.well,gotta mug now.exams starting.

goodnight!

love,

ain

sighh.

2007-09-27T20:56:00.000+08:00

sigh,i love him.

but why must he do this to me?

why must he change so drastically until i dont recognise him anymore?

am i to blame?

why must this always happen to me?

why must i LIVE A life LIKE THIS?

why must i be like this?

why does everyone wants to hurt me?

don't they hurt me enough?

why do they wanna leave me alone?

what is my fault?

STOP IT LAH,EVERYONE!!!!!!!!

i can't stand this stupid shit anymore.

bad,bad day!

2007-09-21T20:56:00.000+08:00

dear diary,i want to be reincarnated or start afresh.i want to start a new life with shahid.he is the only one that understands me well.why does he wants to come back now?i have a bf now.he is just too little too late.this always happen when i have a bf.i really miss him alot.i want to be more than friends with him.don't i even have the opportunity to atleast meet him?i thought he had forgotten all about me since i initiated the "dont-contact-me-anymore".suddenly,he reappear in my life.i just feel so lost.i just don't know what to do.my friends?i'm not close to them anymore.just feel like shutting myself up from the friends.her blog had affected me alot when i read it.i can't believe the person i know to be typing that.i stopped talking to her since.and even if i do,it's just so awkward.looking at the friends around her,i know that she can survive.those people are replacing me,that's why she doesnt feel anything.one person just really,really could replace me.i don't care,really.i hate those sights.i am not jealous,just feel like a stupid moron when i am with them.one more thing,why must she get in contact with my top-hated guy-PET.it's her choice.she once did said that it feels awkward not talking to a close friend even for one day.the close friend was referring to PET.if she feels that way about PET,what does she feel when i don't talk to her for this week?gahh.i have reminded her umpteen times to not get in contact with PET.but since she is stubborn,it is fine with me really.she would rather believe a guy friend of hers rather than her best friend.naja,amirah and athirah now looks like the 3's during sec 1.i feel like crying.but no,i cant cry.i am in the classroom.can't just cry without rhyme or reason.why must i always go to school and put a brave front in front of people when inside feels so sore?where is the ♥ in everyone?am i the one that is changing?i just dont know,ok.i cannot stand anymore living in this deceitful world.may i just fall into a deep,deep sleep today.if i die,forgive me for my sins.hope all is well.amin.

love,

ain

LOVEISCINTA!

2007-09-09T14:13:00.000+08:00

YESTERDAY

went window-shopping at Geylang.

finding brown baju kurung

but to no avail,

brown was not the season colour this Hari Raya.

i have always wanted to wear white baju kurung,too.

eating and drinking under the moonlight,

at the Pasar at Geylang,

chendol and chapati with kima.

it was inexpensive but...

those delicacies was just engaging and,

it made me smile.

bought "LOVE IS CINTA" VCD.

the man selling the VCD said he cried watching the movie.

the first time i saw Hari Raya Lights-Up.

my mom said the lights looked better than the previous years.

it was much,much more brighter

with blue,green,red,orange,yellow lights.

i can now feel the Hari Raya atmosphere!

TODAY

watched "LOVE IS CINTA"!

it was good and very emotional.

almost cried,though.

remembered the times when i was still with Zuhaili.

i can't help but feel oh so sad,

remembering the brief moments i had with him.

such short but deep moments...

i had just wanted an assurance from him.

he had never gave me the assurance.

he should have just said "I LOVE YOU" to me.

why is it so hard to say the word "love" to me?

goshh.i'm still feeling for him.

how can i play with my feelings?

he just doesn't know i cried for him so hard

for almost 1/2 a year.

managed to forget about him,

but he is always the one that will be in my heart forever.

sorry for these emotional part.

did all my homework!

during the process of doing all homeworks,

i revised too.

feel good about myself though.hee.

HSM2 will be starting in 4 hrs and 26 mins.

reviews said that HSM2 is a bit draggy than HSM.

and some said that HSM2 is a letdown.

yadayadayada,whatever.

im still gonna watch it!hha.

TOMORROW

the start of Term 4 in school!

want to have breakfast,as it is the most important part of the day.

btw,fasting period is coming.

i wanna be clean and pure on this period.

TOTALLY,clean and pure!

hee.gee.bee.mee.kee.lee.pee.

talking about pee,

i wanna have my nature call now.

ADIOS everyone.

Love,

ain

love

2007-09-04T21:50:00.000+08:00

so much's happening.i just can't express it in words.im falling in love with this song called "ADA CINTA".and just great cos dad's know i have a blog.i was talking to naja at bro's room and he went into my room and discovered my blog.chicken sia!but i don't feel worried.ahaa.godd,i finished my malay,english and physics homework.alhamdullilah.i'm left with social studies essay and history essay.dammn!i hate essays.ahaa.actually there's math.but since i didn't go for this mock exam,i didn't get the holiday homeworks.dammn!i wanna do math!!haha.complain pulak.hha.anyway,about that song.i really LOOOVE it! :D sang by Acha Septriasa and Irwansyah.the song is for the movie "LOVE IS CINTA".i want to see that movie.if anyone do have the CD,please lend it to me.GODD,that guy just seems to know everything.then would muchly tell a girl.and yeaa.i so hate that guy.stop it lah sehh.kepo no.1!!!!kalahkan mak nam!ahaa.btw,i miss POA's class today.i woke up at 8.34am.then,i didnt wanna go cos class ends at 9.30am.waste time kan!?haha.and tmr i have POA class.it starts at 9.30am and ends at 11am.im gna meet him after class.his paper's end at 12pm.lambatkan?but i sacrificed(kononnye lah eh!haha)my time for him gituu.hehe.i miss him alotalotalot!ok.now i wanna find my sources for history essay.GOODNIGHT!

love,

ain

AOH

2007-08-30T23:14:00.000+08:00

my body aches.gahh.Army Open House(AOH) was superduper fun.there was lotsalotsa army boys.and some are really sick!haha.kidding,but true in some way.hmm.there were quite a handful or should i say a gang of minahs and mats.i so hate it.i brought back alot of souvenirs like pen and keychains and posters and a poncho.haha.the poncho,i threw it away.it was just so freaking me out.ahaa.shaz was totally 'kan chiong' today.but very CUTE!i just love todayy.got out from POA,CHEMISTRY and PSE class today.alhamdullillah!i saw my friends there.like naim,alastair and so on.ahaa.after reaching school around 5pm,we went to see TEACHERS' DAY REHEARSAL.it was refreshing.and i saw my hiphop class instructor.from JDI siaa.haha.im so not an expert in this.but its suppose to be for basic learning.so,me,lulu,naja and ira missed one hiphop class for today.coincidentally,AOH clashes with SPE.hee.abbreviations funny.someone is so two-faced.in malay,depan org lain,belakang org lain!cant deny betul.that someone is totally a flirt."imma flirt....imma flirt....".that song is for that someone.maybe im being a bitch here,but face the fact lah doinkss.tmr is TEACHERS' DAY!i have amirah,lulu,shahrul,shawn,raihan and maybe daniel.my school ends at 12pm tmr.and i have ACES DAY tmr.chicken!soo,im gonna wear my class tee and shorts.hmm.is that ok?of course,NOT!haha.nahh,im kid.i cant wait to meet my old friends at CCKPS.and to HIM,imyl.just now,HE never come to school.gahh.and i wonder why,HE is not using HIS hp today.i forgot to tell u guys that my bill is high.kanasai.cannot use hp anymore siaa.basket!seee,alastair's wordss are stuck in my head.sep hols is coming pretty soon.but i cant enjoy myself yet.i have alot to do this hols.homeworks are just piling up at my shelves.my shelves are really dusty,meaning that i did not touch the shelves since....im not sure either.haha.last announcement,is for all the teachers around the world.HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!wish u teaching geeks will be geeks forever.hha,im joking.i want to meet HIM tmr can?caaaannn-NOT!ahaa.gotcha!gotta go,tmr's schooling.GOODNIGHT!

pics baybeh....

2007-08-25T21:03:00.000+08:00

Pics baybeh! :D

yeahh.

2007-08-25T17:13:00.000+08:00

i registered my product with CREATIVE liao.it is so easy.1,2,3 steps only.haha.have been using my baby since i bought it.now,i want a NINTENDO.haha.lame lor.i like it ah.kan mcm best gitu boleh maen2 game.I LOIKE!friday,was super2 fun.i met a lot of cckpsians.for eg,SAFWAT,NAIM,AZRI and some others.there was naja's friends like AMIRA.my madrasah friend,ZUHAILI.unknowingly,the name is that.haha.and that zuhaili looks like SHAHIDDIN.funny people larr.NAIM is SUPERSUPER HOT!haha.my cckps friend last time.and funny how,he still remembers my name after a long time.his gf is super small.smaller than me, i think.but good thing,im getting taller.but im not gaining any weight sehh.which means im underweight!walaowe.ahaa.and there was adek fyra,FAUZI.selenge larr me.its like i see people i know,but i forgot who they are and what are their names.i want to go out.so boring lah at home.and he just cant understand my language when i say im bored.ape-apelah die.suke sgt maen pool.pegi swimming lagi bagus.walaowe,cant deny betul.i think i wanna go library.want to borrow some books.just lot1 lar!malas deh mahu pergi jauh-jauh.i do not wanna meet him.but i want.but i dont want.walaowe.but then hor,die nak maen pool.ape2 larr.ok relax,ain.pheww.ok.hmm.i think i wanna go and bathe now.then,will think of what i wanna do later.anyway,i predict that it is gonne rain here like super heavy.heee.im still lazy to update photos larr can?sorry babes. :D enjoy your weekend,loves!

love,
ain

hari itu,semalam dan hari ini

2007-08-18T21:06:00.000+08:00

HARI ITU

it was a good day.rained in the morning and it turned out to be so cold.HE didnt come to school,saying it was boring.and so,i embarked on my journey to school ALONE.i had my usual fridays at school.recess was quite special.rendra's band was playing.such smooth play!they should do that more often.it brings life and rythm to ears.good job,though.after school,i had to take two tests.one,is the useless physics test and the other one,is POA TEST.i did the physics test lazily.it was not important at all.me and syafiqa have not do the final accounts test.we waited for ms merdu until 1.45pm.then,we choww from school.i lepak2 with naja and ira.then,we went to macd at limbang to spy on amirah and ehem2.haha.then,i met alot2 of people.i met zuhaili,babat,badam,and HIM.huahuahua.

SEMALAM

i bought something.its small and has a variety of colours.but i chose black.SURPRISE2!!hehe.

HARI INI

will be studying alot2 later.need to catch up with my studies.fnn,i am so lagging behind the rest.walaowe.haha.okok,i gotta go.i am talking to HIM now,actually.

love,

ain

yohaaa......

2007-08-15T18:40:00.000+08:00

yoha guys and girls!i think i ain't gonna private IT anymore.this word IT has a hidden 2 agendas.haha.like spygirl betul!heee.the 2 agendas is my relationship with HIM and my blog.so,im unprivating it at last!!excited or not??OR NOT?!?!haha.anyway,common tests is so DRAAAAAGYYYYY!at last again,im free of this common tests.math was so DUMB!i got back my paper and laughed at the marks.pathetic banget!!haha.14/40. :D physics,was quite hard well though the chapters to revise was just a few.chemistry,which was today,was ok-ok.did not do this 2marks question.haha.selengenye!i hope i can get 20-28 marks for chemistry.weeee.gotta really start revising.actually,this is too late to start revising.like REALLY!wasted a lot of time on lepaks and nonsensical stuffs,thats what i called.im tired.i feel like having a deep,deep sleep.i just dont want to wake up anymore.im so,so tired.well life has to go on.hmm.i ripped athirah's rihanna's CD liao.but still feel like keeping the CD for a lil while.school's getting more chaotic for me.like REALLY!AHAA!!athirah's fav word since i taught her was,"YA ALLAH!".somemore with this expression and feelings.funny sehh.and i have a BABI family-BABIra,BABIqa,BABain,BABnaj.huahuahua.and we made some other names,too.haha.and i made a name for shaidul which is either "ShaiLILEO" or "ShaiCASSO".one name is a scientist,Galileo and another is an artist,Picasso.wellwellwell,i like to make names.not like ms leo or Yeo,CALLING NAMES ONLY!haha.ok merepeknye i!i feel that im getting further away from HIM.entah asal.so saddd.but,i understandlah eh.im a very understanding girl,ok?ishh,takdelah.heee.as the sun comes down,my mind starts to whirl around.sounds funny?no!WEIRD!im getting weirder,mann!entah asal.hmmm.whats making me like this?am i stress?haizz.i dont know.just feel like breaking down when nothing is happening.i think im finding faults with him.i dont know why.and i think this is my dont-know how many fights liao.well,i gotta go to my ngaji.just feel like crying.bye. :'(

haiz. :[

2007-08-07T16:52:00.000+08:00

yoha guys!im so feeling moody this week.I cant blame periods,can I?well,school's fast this week.tomorrow will be my school's NDP celebration.hope it will be a blast!and tomorrow will be the day when my class,3/6 gets an award for being the top in school for achieving our target for the charity.wooohts.im so proud of my class!jia you,3/6!!hehe.im chatting with HIM now.sorry for the privacy!haha.well,this someone keeps reading my blog.i dont like seh!!till now,i dont get it why everyone wants to be that person's friend.ape-ape lah eh!haha.im chatting with my chatterbox,SHAHIDDIN!haha.he is adorable.we're gonna meet on thursday,maybe.he will be at City Hall with his bunch of friends.i miss him,kindaof.hmm.tomorrow's a half day for every students.maybe i wanna take my POA TEST which has long overdued.haha.buat bodoh ajelah.oh yeah,i almost forgot.i wanna tell you guys about my saturday outing with HIM and girlfriends.it was super,duper fun.i met HIM at Limbang.we both wear green!tak janji eh!haha.sumpah,tak janji.haha.then,we met RD,mimi,damdam,qalqal,rizriz,farfar.i think thats all!i was like the only girl there.so awkward!if ira and naja,didnt go.mampos aku!the ONLY GIRL ON EARTH!haha.met ira and naja at ira's busstop.went to Shaw Centre.but the movie i wanna watch which is "ALONE" was at 7pm.decided to watch Simpson's there.but then,the 3 girls there was stubborn.so,we went to Vivo.check the movie "ALONE" again.it was at 4.50pm.but separate seatings.so,we dont want.finally,we watched Simpson's.it was funny yet disgusting!thank you guys for the wonderful day.it was just pleasant to be there with you guys.you guys made my day.and to HIM,thank you for the wonderful day.that was the first time,we held hands for a long time.and u paid my movie ticket.so sweeeeeeeeeet!haha.may we last long,ok HIM?i love you so much.hmm.i will be having my madrasah later on.i wanna bathe and iron my clothes.and go lot1.and buy some foods.and then go madrasah.wow!hectic banget!haha.mondays' are worst,tuesdays' are much more worse.i will be updating pictures when im free again.goodbye!have a great holiday. :DD

love,
ain

long long ago,long long ago.

2007-08-03T17:07:00.000+08:00

hello people.i have a gazillion things to write about but i cant possibly do that.like duhh.SO,i will be summarising the events that took place from last saturday till now.

SATURDAY,27 Aug

i was confused whether to go for NDP eco-challenge or not.
in the end,i went. :]
naja and ira didnt go, so i was with nat,amee,elly,ana and lulu.
we had so much fun with wen haw(but we called him names.haha.'ah boon,boonboon and so on!').
andrew got really jealous.haha.
we made a dikir barat called,"DUNK IT!".
we are supposed to perform this next thursday.
camwhore so much!just look at elly's friendster.hehe.
will be having more fun with wen haw and andrew next thursday.
and this is so the first time i saw shahiddin! :DD

Sunday,28 Aug

went out all alone to the library.
need some resources to study.

and so the rest of my weekdays was spent with loved ones.mugging as usual.exams are just around the corner.and i effing miss HIM.argh.but my mom came back in time before i burst into fits of anger for not wanting to see him just now.im alright,sweets.everyone's sleeping now,i guess.i dont know what to wear for tomorrow.im so not prepared.and i have this fnn coursework thingy which is 25 pages and have to be handed in on monday.crazy or what??haiyo.school's just bugging me!bug me more,i dont care.read naja's friend's gf's blog.im astonished!well,anything and whatever to her.haha.chatting with babat was a pleasure.his hair is super frolickingly cute!and he wanna cut it.walaowe!haha.now,i wanna sms HIM after 6 hours of not contacting him.and its near to midnight.gahh.i dont wanna the night to end.well,ira is sleepy but wanna read this post first.so toodles everyone!have a nice weekend! :]

all the love,

ain

mommy cried! :(

2007-07-27T16:24:00.000+08:00

hello everyone!today's fun and funny!i love today.yeahh.and so i AAMMMMM with HIMMMMMMM.cannot tell!TOP CONFIDENTIAL SECRET!only besties knew it.i love my besties.they helped me along in this.do you think its too fast?i think it was.but to him,the faster it is the better.well,lets just flirt along ok.haha.270707's the official date.boleh tahan sedapkan the date?of course!kate ainkan??haha.terikut-ikut HIM gituu.i miss HIM.today PE was GREEATTTT!there were 5 games stations.gerek banget!my group is super-duper cooperative.and along the games,i find out that i have classmates that are super nice.now,i feel that i know them better.my perspective of them has change.and thats good!hehe.today,all of my girls made me laugh like beruk.really!haha.i love them all with my big,big heart.haha.then,i went to lot1 after school.need to peepee.hehe.then after peeing,went to eat at LJS.combo1 as per normal.dah kenyang ni.and now,need to poop.haha.ehh,talking about pooping i remembered something.i watched punk'd just now after i got home.the singer is kelly rowland.she was suppose to meet serena williams at somewhere.and she paid a chauffeur to drive her to this place.this chauffeur yang mastermind gitu.he brought his son along.then along the journey,his son wanted to poop.abe busuk mcm nak rak!then like kecoh2 like that.then,TA-DAAA!she's been officially PUNK'D!haha.ok,enough of pooping.i was supposed to go to CCA.but then hor,i lost contact with lulu and amee.jadi mcm stranded on an island sekejap.haha.i called ana too.but then she said dont go,cos she's not going.haha.takpee,nextweek i will go.SWEAR!so me,shaz,ira and naja went to the library.i borrowed a book called "1,003 Great Things About Being A Woman".it is super nice and funny.There's one part when it says,"Mary Poppins was supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.".try and say it!issh3.haha.i love being a woman!haha.and on PSE!that was the most wonderful thing that has happened to 3/6.to me,i think ms chew has really low expectations from us.even mrs eswaran was so proud of us.we were the top in school to have exceed our target for fund-raising.i mean,like hello?!3/6 sia!!!haha.i love my class!and mrs eswaran really love going in to 3/6.she's cool.and funny.hehe.and she really trust our class so much.i love her!hehe.im so gonna like next year.hehe.but must FOCUS on studies.hehe.im waiting for ira to eat her lundi(meaning lunch-cum-dinner) and send me the songs i wanted!haha.cepat sikit eh nenek!haha.jkjk.i didnt come to school on thursday anyway.i was down with flu,a slight fever and sore throat.my big sis was down with it too.so,we went to the doctor together.i was given the yellow pill and some pink lozenges.nice!haha.i wonder when does medicines taste nice??haha.ok,ok.stop it!and for the first time,i saw two people today.meaning izwan and shaz's bro.izwan is this tall and lanky guy who liked me before.and shaz's bro is so like shaz!mcm twinies!haha.ok.this is the end of me now.byebye.and goodnight! :]

talks are useless!

2007-07-23T15:54:00.000+08:00

hi.im dreadfully tired.i cant talk or eat in peace.i cant sleep.i cant share everything with people.went home,dragging my feets behind.leaving footprints everywhere i go.im not being negative.but from the way everything goes today,i didnt exist.i really didnt.problems occur to me everytime when im feeling extremely happy.i just wonder why.haiz.and i do not want to be rude to my parents.im scared of being rude to them.maybe its just the satans doing this to me.i dont want to be an insolent child.i just want to be an individualist.im trying to reform myself to be a better person.what something serious HE said struck me through the heart.i really should change.im not going to be gullible or naive ok.since young,i had the chance to indulge into the world of being independent.i am a big girl.but they told me i wasnt.and big girls dont cry.but i let that phrase pass.i cried enough.god's testing me,i know.i can live w/o friends.but family,NO.but everything and anyone just wants to leave me.and why,must god take the one i like or love away?im being patience enough.i just feel like closing my eyes and fall into a dark,dark sleep.then will my problems go away and i will be happy in that 7th cloud.ending life just seems so difficult though.well but fear not,i wouldnt.i just wanna change to be one true example of a Muslim.pray for me yea.may god bless all of you who's reading this.people who wants to change for the better,lets join hands and say that we can do it.INSYAALLAH.and one more thing.dont worry guys,im ok.i just wanna cleanse my soul,thats all.goodbye little people! :]

gahhhh.

2007-07-22T14:15:00.000+08:00

hey guys.im so not in the mood to talk.everything's a mess.just because of my one stupid mistake.so fine!i lied to my parents.they have never developed a close relationship with us,the children.NEVER!if we had that kind of relationship,i would not have lied.even if i told them the truth,they wouldnt have believed me anyway.what ever that i have done,im so so sorry parents.i just want US to be close.and i want US to trust each other 100% completely.when the "handphone" incident happened,i dont have anyone to turned to.even if i told them,they would have scold me.and why must the children behaved this way?it is because of your way of handling children that is.my advice to them is to find another way of handling the children and dont always find faults with the children.everyone do make mistakes.dont tell me everyone is perfect??i mean,im learning from my mistake.and i dont ever want to repeat that mistake anymore.what about them?would they want to learn from their mistakes?and must my dad talk to the principal just for a slight mistake?im tired of this luhh dad!can u just change for the better??if i can change for the better,why cant you?maybe he thinks that he is in charge of the house and he can do whatever he wants?well im part if it too.they can scold us anytime and anywhere they want.i dont care.but why must they humiliate me like that?i just dont get it.im trying to put myself in their shoes.i know how they feel.but do they care how the children feels?we are in an era where everything else changes.mama,ayah i am sorry.i just feel that if we have this misunderstanding again,you guys would know what to do next.goodbye everyone.im sorry to HIM.we shouldnt have been together ytd.i am so so sorry.maybe we should just end it here ok.i love you very much.i dont wanna leave you,but for the best of everyone we should break this up.everyone wants to take the ones i love away from me. :'(

{*i just cant stop crying*}

SADD!

2007-07-17T23:10:00.000+08:00

I AM TIRED!

TIRED OF FACING PROBLEMS!!

UNDERSTAND PEOPLE?!

THESE PEOPLE DONT KNOW THE MEANING OF GETTING HURT!!!!

I JUST DONT GET IT!

AM I WRONG???

EVEN IF IM WRONG,SAY IT IN MY FACE LUHH!!!

FIRST THING,MY GRANDFATHER'S IN HOSPITAL.

HE IS SICK ACCORDING TO MY DAD.

HOPE HE'S RESTING WELL.

AND HOPE ITS NOT THAT BAD.

SECOND THING,I CANT SMS HIM!!!!!

MOM BROUGHT THE HP.

GOSSH KAN?!

BUT I UNDERSTAND AS IT IS HER HP.

BUT STILLLLLL!!!! :[

THIRD THING,IS MY PRIMARY FRIEND.

SHE WAS QUITE CLOSE TO ME.

SUDDENLY,SHES STOP TALKING TO ME.

STOP SMSING ME.

STOP CALLING ME.

STOP ASKING ME HOW I AM.

HAIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

stop ok?

ive had enough.

i dreamt of something bad.

i pray to God that it will not happened to me.

AMIN.

al-ameen

2007-07-14T23:45:00.000+08:00

hello.i just got back from dinner outside.i ate at Al-Ameen Eating House.its a nice place to EAT!ira must love it.*haha*oh yess,im sorry ira for causing you not to go to the party.very,very sorry! :[ dad wants to treat us to dinner there.he loved it there.i have some pics of the food we ate there.super-duper yummy!my food came late.i ordered mutton chop.my parents almost finished their food even before my food came.i ate rushingly lah can?before eating my dinner,we went to Beautyworld Centre.has a lot of shops in there.i bought a Casio watch which is cheap!from a $95,the watch now costs $38.of course,its genuine.im so excited to tell my friends.i took pic of it too.i did my math homework before going out,so yeahh.tomorrow,i only wanna read up for history.this word is dedicated to geegeeman,"yyyyyeeeeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!".*hehe*geegeeman sure likes lilo and stitch,i guess.i wanna buy digital things luhh.i wanna the new zenstone with screen one.and i wanna nintendo.must be fun if i have those cool gadgets.haizz.feeling like Kim Possible gitu.*hehe*andd i saw bapuks at al-ameen.when i was walking out,this guy looked at me.i looked at him too.i thought he was a man,of course.skali his friend who looked like a bapuk went towards him.when that guy stand up,nampak sah gay jugak.shocking but true!*wakaka*someone who looked so refined but turns out to be a gay!!haiyoo.i dont get this kind of ppl.an irritating person is always behind my back.goshh.cannot stand it luhh can this few weeks.well,i wanna doze off to dreamland soon!have a good rest guys... :]

GOODNIGHT!

sinaran! :]

2007-07-13T23:19:00.000+08:00

today was spent well with my two buddies again-NAJA & IRA!they are the ones who makes me laugh,smile,cry and pee everyday.everyday turns into an enjoyable day.woohooo.naja taught me how to do the "Mr Roboto" moves.and i did it!but after that,forget again.haiyoo.senile me!*hehe*me and ira tried it umpteen times.still never get it.we suntanned too!*hahaha*naja was so egg-cited when the fiery sun came out.ira helped us to put the lotion on our legs.she is the "rubber".*haha*hmm,i forgot to tell u guys that i have a harry potter family at school.Regent Secondary School changed the name to Regwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.ira is athimort, naja is najadore, ain is aingrid, elly is grifelly, lulu is lumione, shaz is shnape.funny right the names?*hehe*i have a crush on youuu lahh.ehh,not you.HIM!but its just a crush right?anyway,we decided to have dinner together.skali,naja cannot make it lahh.haiyaa.AND,i left my wallet with her.so i must go her house and take it.so,me and ira take it.then we jalan2 until kaki patah.then when we were going to the busstop near BPP,banyak budak lelaki or should i say 'mats' whistle at us.i mean like hello??merepek luhh.then dah naek bus.this auntie very funny!!her hair is damn curly.then at the back of the head hor,wear wig lor.aiyoo.natural sikit lah auntie!then she sleeps at ira's stomach.almost tau!*haha*if only,naja was there!she would laugh heartily.*hehe*yaaa,and we saw someone that looks like zainul.but of course not himm.budak NS luhh.*hehe*there was also a cute guy with his family.kau miss luhh naja!haiyak.and so i got home at 10.10pm.lama benar!and sorry to someone.im being judgemental.*haha*i love PSE!its fun.and PE today was super-duper fun lor.we have a new programme.my team name is Garfield.*haha*i know,lame right?but we have more games coming up the next few weeks.very the excited!so thats all.and here some pics for you to see. :]

GOODNIGHT!

hello,hello.

2007-07-12T23:30:00.000+08:00

hello guys.today i am having an "ENGLISH DAY!".*haha*i will be summarising the events that took place the past few days.ok not,my engriss??*hehe*anyway,a lot of funny,stupid,weird and unique things took place.the funny thing is everyday is a laughing day.--->FOR ME ONLY AH!the stupid things is the lame,lame jokes we made.and how we tease each other stupidily but very adorable,u know.*lol*the weird things is that when guys turned into stones looking at girls!i mean,what do they get from that?the girls OR their popout eyeballs??i mean,LIKE HELLOOO!*hehe*lastly,the unique things.like for eg,today ira's very unique.she has the "kero" eyes.and i have the tendency to do like the movie "Zombi Kampung Pisang".the "lemah-lembut" hands.*hehe*unique's the name!woohts.*haha*and,i met ZUHAILI the other day.boy,i misss him! :] with his red bike!goshh.i miss that thing too.waddahell.and i also miss my other half.shahiddin.haizz.dont know what's happening to the world?maybe its just global warming.thats why everyone feels the heat and do not wanna contact with me.ok ain,dont be emo here.can?of course,can luhh. :DD *haha*i see myself that i have improved alot on my studies.but as usual,i have not started on revision yet.4 weeks more to exams.can you imagine that?gahhh.talking about exams,reminded me of my math mock exam.we cheated luhh can?even though we did it together as friends,i guess im still gonna get my sweet single-digit marks.*hehe*i have really no confidence lahh.haiz.well,its ok.anyway,theres a "mrs swan" teaching math in school.and shes teaching my class.its just difficult to understand my former math teacher, then change to another one who just doesnt seems to get it right.so bad luhh me?but its just a FACT!right naja?*haha*for two days,i spent my days with two gorgeous friends-NAJA and IRA.it was super-duper fun!the turning-faces-into-one-red-tomato laughters just boomed my delicate ears.ira is one voracious girl!and naja is one impish girl!well im not sure if the words suit them.but who cares?we just laughed at all the people who passed by us.i mean one scene i remembered was this kindergarten girl.*haha*see,i have not even tell u the story then i laugh already.gila me!she shouted to her brother,"kakak nak balek.kakak nak berak.kakak tak tahan.ok?!".she was like running while shouting to her brother.we, the trio, laughed like hell!we were huddled closely to one another at a bench at a park.some parts when we almost went down on our knees and roll on the ground.today was also funny.we three really was on the brink of peeing.we called geegeeman and he said can,tumpang.but its ok.we would rather control our bladder then going there.right girls?so,thats it!my wonderful days with my two pretty,sweet,vicious,gorgeous,cute,crazy,small,funny,weird,unique girlfriends.awww,so sweet luhh me...*hehe*no shame-shame one this girl!*haha*oklah,toodles.

GOODNIGHT!

Just pictures...

2007-07-06T17:03:00.000+08:00

Gue malas bener mau taip.jadi gambar-gambar ini adalah tatapanmu untuk hari ini.

TERIMA KASIH!

ANDD,anyway someone broke my heart ytd.

gahh.

ok.enjoy beautiful people! :]

{*Your talent is God's gift to you.What you do with it is your gift back to God.*}

long time no see!

2007-07-05T22:57:00.000+08:00

helo!its almost 1 week since i blogged.im lazy and was too tied up with homework.its like in the back of my mind now.*haha*getting rid of homeworks are halfway through.just finished my graph homework.its bloody hell tau buat graph!well though,its easy.STILL!drawing one is tough.*hehe*aku ni bukan unsangkarables tapi unkecohables!*wakaka*lame me!so,school's been tough on me.bawa skola satu pen!pathetic kan??anyway,i feel so stressed lor.dahlah byk homework, then byk problems.goshh.its killing me!arghhh.ok ain?jgn emo sngt.cikgu tak suke tau.eh,perangai budak perempuan yang suke pekik2 tu mcm bininye tarzan agaknye.hai,mcm paham2 jelah eh.perkataan dari seseorang yang suke berfalsafah.*haha*today,i went stationery shopping with girlfriends!woohts.actually,shaz pun nak.skali ade masalah besar!aku yang shopping.*haha*angkut punye angkut dah $7+.goshh.kalau beli bubble tea, isshh lagi muai!*haha*takpe,for the sake of learning!semangat deh aku!cross-country on friday was a boo-boo.so damn hot.but ya,had a long talk and walk with naja!RESILIENCE WON!of course,without Rendra Hairul mesti kalahnye.*hehe*i love her.anyway,abt last sunday.me,amee and naja went to "YESCOM".gerek banget.ade dudduds.*hehe*weird spelling.i got a free $20 coupon from my aunt.so,we belanje until ketiak dah basah and duit dah habes.pandai tak kite?*haha*global warming betullah earth ni.070707's coming soon in 2 days time.wearing GREEN kalau nak klua.kononnye nak bagi my full support lah ni.*lol*selenge banget deh aku!and i bought a bookmark,a green-and-yellow stone and a black ring.lawa2 budak kreatif ni buat!*hehe*and i saw RAIHAN!very the sweeeet.*haha*but she stick out her tongue at me sehh, and so i did it back to her again too.childish betullah! :] skrg,im alone.i mean enggak lagi sms SI DIA.semue mcm nak avoid aku gitu.well,whatever to them!!just now,i was freaking mad at this big,fat,ugly ogre.kan aku betul!use lah aku lagi.lepas dah tanak,kitar semula aku.bagus skali!siape yang berani buat aku mcm tu lagi,jage!i believe in retribution,ok!?one's enough luhh.and im like anti-guys!i really,really hate luh can?dah 3 experience dah cukuplah.and GOODNIGHT!my heart is crying inside after that conversation. :(

shahiddin!

2007-06-29T21:48:00.000+08:00

This post is dedicated to a great guy.

Really,a great guy!

He was different.

He was unique.

He helped me alot.

Even though,I've known him for 1+ months.

He was very special.

He was a dear in my eyes.

I wonder if I could live w/o a guy like him.

If only, I could turn back time and tell him that I LOVE HIM.

He was the ever shining diamond in a jewellery shop!

*chuckles*

He changed my life-in a good way.

I learned to love him.

I want to know him more.

I want to give him those oohs-aahs hugs ever.

I wonder if he is reading this?

IT IS FOR YOU,OK!

15's quite a big number.

I'm not 15 yet.gahhh.

thanks to you...

*hehe*

But still!We are kiddos,right?in some way or another?

*wakakaka*

If you are reading this,I just wanna say I MISS YOU TRUCKLOADS and I LOVE YOU MUCH2!

Have a wild,bubbly,yummy,cheeky,dicky,dudu,jaja 15th Birthday!!

and that jaja is actually-NAJA!

*haha*

Alas,I will reveal the ONE AND ONLY.......

MR.....

SHAHIDDIN!!!!!

Happy Birthday To You,

Happy Birthday To YOU.

Happy Birthday To Shahiddin!

Happy Birthday To You.

:DD

May you be blessed this year with a girl!

See!Wishing that you will find your dream girl.

*hehe*

Sorry,didnt buy you a present.But here,I HAVE A CAKE!makan tau,artifically flavoured!

GOODNIGHT EVERYONE!

ADIOS! :]

SCHOOL,IMMM BAAACKKK!!

2007-06-27T17:21:00.000+08:00

SCHOOOOOOOL,IMMMM BAAACCKKK!!

*haha*

sorry tidak mengupdate my blog.was quite busy since the first day of school.im effing bored now,thats why.the first day of school was normal.macam dah lame gitu tak nampak girlfriends.hugs and kisses was given out everywhere.*hehe*BEWARE!there is a pervert somewhere in between you and your friends.*haha*tuesday was veryyy tiring!me and girlfriends went to eat lunch at KFC.i was kindaof broke!jadi beli Shroom's meal aja.CHEEAPPP!i wanna save money for someone's bday,though.we laughed like hell lor.we laughed at ira mostly.*wakaka*irakan kaum _N_I_(fill in the blanks,ira!),and we laughed at just her self being.*muahahaha*then,there were some U-G-L-Y monsters or freakos from "TAK CUKUP SIFAT SCHOOL".REEEAALLY!!they want to tease us,but in the end we ended up teasing their arse off.waddahell kan!?*haha*suddenly,"boleh tahan cute" guys came into KFC.boleh tahanlah.10,000 TIMES BETTER THAN THOSE MONSTERS!*wakaka*and i created stupid,lame jokes.and we laughed like HELL!i almost fell off my seat.naseb tak jatuh.*hehe*i was like,what if people really laugh like "haha,heehee,wakakaka,muahaha,lol,rofl and so on"?and we tried it!ended up "rofl,rofl,rofl!"kan selenge kan?infront of those "boleh tahan guys"?mygodd.there was sppose to be painting for the canteen toilet.but we heard they are just chosing the toilet door design.and so,we did not go.we jalan2 around lot1 to fill our boredom.and we spent such quality time!today.hmmm.i was a bit grumpy and irritated.and summore,global warming.i feel like if i didnt bathe,it is better.mandi peluh seh kat skola!cannot FOCUS.learned so much and there are so many homework lying around me.do not know which one to start with.*haha*"someone" was so sarcastic to me.kalau betul,takpe.maen2 aje.please luhh.argghh.there are so many characters around the world.too many of them!thats why there is global warming.haiyooo.ms merduati was so damn kind!she bought us this small,fluffy animal toys from australia.and she is filthy rich.*hehe*her nieces are so LUCKY to have her as an aunt!wished that i have an aunt like that who will take me for a holiday overseas,too.kan gerek!?and guess what?i have not been smsing SI DIA since god-knows-when.5 days to be exact!omg.i miss SI DIA.wonder if SI DIA misses me too?if SI DIA does,come to me baybeh.i think im having PMS.not surelah,kiddos!gotta go.wanna watch my fav show and have my teatime!and bathe.and do my homework.better do your homework,guys rather than reading my blog.*haha*joking eh.then,do tag! :]

GOODNIGHT EVERYONE!

GIRLS

2007-06-25T16:26:00.000+08:00

HEY!dah delete leh friendster.*haha*kesian,kesian.selama ini aku mencantikkannya,sudah dibuang begitu sahaja.*haha*kata-kata yang sungguh menyedihkan.kan??*hehe*so,i lied!i lied to you guys that i will not be going out yesterday.but eventually,i did lor.mamaku ajak pergi City Hall.mamaku sungguh jahat!dia tinggalkan aku dirumah.goshh.i just step inside my room to change,then dah biseng.suruh cepat2!then i heard a loud bang of the gate.nampak sah dah klua!aku rushing lor.with minimal makeup.ahhaa.since there's no mirror in the room,lagi panic sikit.naseb dapat catch up!!there's this shop that sells cheap but good stuffs at City Hall.but usually,i went there to buy my undies,bra or jeans.*haha*so the very the open lor me!!Lor me?maciam itu makanan.LOR MEE!*wakaka*but really lor,cheap!!all the bra costs $3.90 and the undies cost $1.00-$1.90.the shop name is "SHOP IN".PROMOTE,PROMOTE!eyy duhh,takkan nak shop out??lame,lame me!bukan cacat eh!*haha*anyway,mamaku mahu beli her black pants for work.jadi tolong sebok adelah.*hehe*we spent like 2 hours in there.want to choose the bra design,thats why.*haha*so basically,they sell shoes,shirts,pants,undies,bra,skirts,jeans,jackets,wallet,swimming wear,bags,blouses and souvenirs.then,we went to Raffles City to EAT!*haha*we ate roti prata at "FOOD JUNCTION".yummy!!then,kite shopping vitamins!*hehe*what i meant was,we went to Unity Healthcare.mamaku mahu beli her Centrum vitamins.tapi,tak jadi!because this kind lady promotes us to Kordel's.and summore,2 boxes of 30 or 60 capsules for the price of $36.85.cheapkan?and it has all the vitamin from A-Z.*haha*ANDD,the whole family could consume it!jadi apelagi,go and buy ok!*hehe*then,me and nana sebok2 tgk the directory.and we saw GIRLS!!!!THAT WAS SOOO MY FAV SHOP IN MALAYSIA!everytime i go Malaysia,i will definitely find GIRLS!its very girly,girly shop.and by the name,of course,its only for GIRLS!*haha*so sexist!nolah,kidding.and so,it sells shirts,pants,skirts,pencilbox,hairbands,earrings,clips,bags.yeaaa.EXCITED LAH!it was open 1 month ago at Raffles City.Level 3,ok?*haha*PROMOTE,PROMOTE!i bought a pink-purplish hairband.very nice!and i just noticed,it is the same colour as my GIRLS bag.waddahell.but its ok.so now,i have GIRLS pencilbox,bag and hairband.3 things and still counting.*haha*i want to buy the pencilbox can?this year,didnt bought any.so,CAN!!!*heehee*and i also bought myself a new facial foam.NIVEA-Deep Pore Control Foam.i dont have nice skin,asamatteroffact.my skin is pimply.and so after much reading,i decided to buy that.it seems like its working.but of course,lets wait until 1 month.*wakaka*i just got back from school.it was purely fun!everyone seems different.just because of one thing-HAIRCUT!!rabak benar aku ketawekan orang-orang yang tertentu.of course not you,NAJA!*haha*the day was spent with each of my friends.balek pun ade ORANG temankan.so,gerek lor school today.and now,im stuck with SOCIAL STUDIES holiday reflections.but its damn easy!so can!*hehe*and now,chinka and chunka of pictures for you to see. :]

delete friendster!

2007-06-23T16:43:00.000+08:00

hey.why is it so hard to delete my friendster account?goshh.i typed everything carefully and properly and it still doesnt wants me to delete that damn thang.im asking ira now.hope she could help me out.mcm tiba-tiba je kan,delete friendster!?nahh.i just wanna delete it after such a long time thinking.to me,it is a waste of time.just wasted,ok?well forget about friendster.hah.forgot to update u guys on my trip to Sentosa.so,it was ok-ok.felt different though.the environment around my friends was just different.maybe only I felt the difference.soo,day was spent well with girlfriends.it was fun as we have not meet each other since that day.which day ah?ok,nvm forget about that.we went to Tanjung Beach!so soft lor,the sand!!!ANNDD,before i forget!that idiotic ARDIE INDRA,go and smash cake at my face!waliaowe!!!kanasai betullah.siape yang birthday ni?aku ke???anyway,was abit mad!but its ok lor.*hahaha*u guys should have seen my chocolatey,creamy,whippy face!yikes.org tgk aku pun macam nak lari!!*hehe*ingat makhluk mane yang datang kat singapura ni??sikulipat betul!then,we ate dinner at Vivo.BURGER KING'S!SEDAP!!aku kalau dah lapar.isshhh.macam boleh makan athirah gitu!*haha*yeaaaa.abe,balek kene lecture sikit.i wanna go home after eating dinner,but......hmm.nothing lah.then yesterday,i was like a cleanerman!*lol*i cleaned my toilet.i cleaned my table which was infested with alot of useless stuffs.and yang funny nye,i mop!serious!!first time seh,mop my room!tapi gereklah.must get used to doing household chores sooner or later.nanti dah kahwin ke...ehh,KAHWIN!?please.im so not going to get married.dulu,nak!tapi sekarang...i just do not wanna fall in love again.ok,get it?i dont know why though.dah malas aku nak layan the affairs of the heart.jadi FEMINIST!!can??i havent finish my holiday homework.goshh.mampos aku!but who cares?kate holiday kan!?and im so not going to do that canvas thing.i dont even know how to draw.i know how to copyright only.*haha*sorry,mdm faz!today seems like a good weather.but im not going out today.will be doing a lot of reading.reading's GOOD!*hehe*takpelah,jadi bookworm pun bagus!!or a new word,bookAIN!*hehehe*mcm bookaburra!*haha*and lately,ive been buying myself mags."seventeen"!well though,im not yet 17!!*haha*ini bermakna saya sudah tidak sabar lagi untuk menjadi 17.apalagi,16!?well,got to go.wait...MY TABLE!

EH,WRONG ONE!OOPSS!!

MY CLEAN TABLE!!!!

GOODYBYEEE!

heyy alll!

2007-06-20T21:28:00.001+08:00

hi girlfriieendss and guyyfriiienndss.yesterday went to the Tampines Megastores-IKEA,COURTS and GIANT!see even when i typed "GIANT" it even becomes bigger or should i say,GIANTGANTIC!*hehe*nilah,org yang tak cukup sifat."sikulipat" betul!interesting word i learnt from my kakak.that gila!*no harm!no harm!*ahaa.so setelah sampai di Tampines.ok wait!punyelah lame naek MRT alllllllll the way to Tampines!!!i almost died of too much sitting down.ehh?got such thing meh people die that way!?kanasai lor.sudah sampai di sana,aku naik shuttle bus.FREEEEEEEEE!*haha*of courselah,Singaporeans ah very the KIASU.so im very proud to be one!!anyway,i roam the IKEA like nobody's business lorr.at last,i bought a purple wavy vase and an artificial red flower.and the whole cost is,$2.65!AMAZING!!i know.so,gogogogogogogogo and buybuybuybuybuybuybuy things atatatatatatatatatatatat IKEA!alright?gila me ah!*hahaha*then hor,tomorrow i am going to SENTOSA!excited!cause ah,got someone's birthday party.but then hor,if i dont go the birthday party,also can lor!cause my wish is to go to the beach.thats all!my WISH!jadi,kite enjoyenjoy di beachbeach... :] now,pictures of me and stuffs coming up.

{*Two Hearts,Two Minds,In time,Did find,One Love,One Aim,Two paths,The same!*}

everyone in this world is fakers!!!!

2007-06-18T16:23:00.001+08:00

hello guys.u know what?!everyone in this world are fakers,man!i mean like really,really!REALLY!*haha*ok,serious.since im born in this world,everyone puts on their masks everywhere they go.i do,sometimes.but when i wear it,i wonder if people will know if im faking it or something.god knows,of course.but the thing is,i dont wanna put on mask.i dont wanna be fake.i dont wanna be plastic.i just dont want.ok?get it?so anyway,chunks of pictures for you to see.... :]

{*Love is two hands entwined,a lingering kiss,a swelling of the heart...*}

3 days!

2007-06-17T14:41:00.000+08:00

its been 3 long,solid days since i blogged!goshh.tak baek u know my abang!?he blamed me for the spoiled laptop charger.like hello???when i on,it was like that already lor!haiyo.then,blame me??find out the truth or evidence first can?then if its really me,go and punish me.can?ok,so i really wanna go to the beach!i ajak SI DIA.but im not sure if SI DIA mahu ikut atau tidak.jadi aku chiowsinchi first.and show u some vogue-de-vas pictures.... :DD

{*Love is when you look into someone's eyes,and see everything you need.*}

2007-06-14T23:36:00.000+08:00

Big Girls Dont Cry-FERGIE

La da da da da

The smell of your skin lingers on me now

You're probably on your flight back to your home town

I need some shelter of my own protection baby

To be with myself and center

Clarity, peace, serenity

[chorus:] I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightenin' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

The path that I'm walking, I must go alone

I must take the baby steps till I'm full grown, full grown.

Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?

And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

[chorus:] I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightenin' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Like the little school mate in the school yard

We'll play jacks and uno cards

I'll be your best friend and you'll be my valentine

Yes you can hold my hand if you want to

'Cause I want to hold yours too

Well be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds

But it's time for me to go home

It's getting late, dark outside

I need to be with myself and center

Clarity, peace, serenity

[chorus:] I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightenin' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It´s time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

La da da da da da

ZOO! :]

2007-06-12T23:38:00.000+08:00

i am here to say that i love you guys.without u guys,there wouldnt be lovers.and without u guys,i will die just to see u.see how much u mean to me?A LOT!ok?*haha*so u guys should know who u are,right?no need to say more.SO.NOW.right here at my blog,you guys are brought into your own fascinating world!!! :DD

THE

SINGAPORE

ZOO!

SHOCKED?thinking that it was u,when its actually the animals in the ZOO!!*hahahahahaha*dumbfounded right?*hehe*like waddahell lah me,kan?so,the experience of going there was so funlah,can?dah lame seh!like what?7,8 years?and alot have change.and when i said that,kindaof DRASTICALLY!(over-exagerrating,can?!!)anyway,i was waiting for the 927 bus.so damn slowlah,can?!and my stomach hurts like hell!mcm gastric pains.then,my surroundings turned black,blue like that.mcm nak pengsan and sudd,DIE!*touch wood,touch wood or CHOY AH!* *hehe* so,i went to the toilet and let out everything thats stuck in my throat.put some ointment and went off.soon as i reach there,the monkeys were like all around me!*geli i!*and it was a very educational trip!boleh belajar tentang SI DIA!DIA sungguh merapeks.and as usual being SINGAPOREANS,kiasuism are always in their hearts.i saw some picking some tropical leaves from the tropical crops area!waddahell kan?ok,anyway pics to show you!!!!1,2,3.CHAKKK!

(SLEEPING TIME!!)

guess what??

2007-06-10T00:02:00.000+08:00

guess what??AMAZINGLY!and i say again,AMAZINGLY!!!!!i went out shopping on my own.klaka kan??i mean like hello??AIN,GOING OUT ON HER OWN!like waddahell.my fav quote for today is "can't deny!".*haha*and i didnt know someone's back from her holiday.*hee*must be sleeping right now.goshh,everything's happening so fast.ira's back,naja's lazing around (ehemm,as usual lah tu!),amee's running around in circles and me?well,me?hmm,going out on my own is a MUSTLAH!i need peace and serenity nowadays.mom kept nagging,lah can?!she really has the thinking that i really,really have a boyfriend!like waddahell kan?tuduh sembarangan je!find proof first lah,moumou!goshh,she's really turning into one red ogre now.siket2 marah!aku lari rumah baru tau.im so sick of life.its not like anyone cares about me.and this is so true!nak ckp kawan,i rarely contact them.nak ckp,guys?who wants me?nak ckp,family?lagi tak kesah.i shouldnt have gone home seh just now.should have just gone m.i.a.!!goshh.i would rather go to school than having fucked holidays.i like to "maki" nowadays!klaka kan?weird-weird me!i dont know whats happening to me??i feel so different.i feel really,really different!whats wrong with me?i think i goddamn miss him.senang sangat aku nak nangis,senang sangat aku nak ketawe.i have never felt this way.today when i went out,everything's felt funny and queer.i think im turning into one ugly,crazy bitch.and thats like so a fact!gahhh.im even crying right now.see,becoming a bitch is stupid!i think i would rather be the same old girl like last time.innocent,gullible girl!dah,thats it!the solution is to,become a geek.im not ugly betty,im "ugly ain!".nice one,ain!GOOD JOB!well,need some time alone now.

GOODNIGHT! :'(

2007-06-08T16:41:00.000+08:00

hey,back from school.today is such a boring day.i could almost fell asleep.but didnt as i wanna blog.*haha*yesterday's blog was very emotional.and so i said to myself,i cant be too sad because of that.i mean,like hello?i have a life.and i want it to be a more fun and positive life.i hope it does goes well.thought of going to lulu's house to watch "POCHONG"!but she said that it is at her cousin's place and anyway,she will be going to malaysia today at night.*gahh*so,u see?what a dull life im living,man!guys dont sms me anymore.especially that little fashionista.god,i hope he do sms me sooner or later.i do not have anyone to talk to.except for naja,my dear.*hee*but still!!u know,i still remembers his first sentence to me,"he will always be there when i need him".my lord,im so puzzled by the irony sentence to my situation now.*haiz*and the best song that describes now is "4 in the morning" by Gwen Stefani.u guys better take note of the lyrics.its so deep and meaningful.TO ME.gotta start do my homework next week as next week there's no art.and that will be like what?B-O-R-I-N-G!see, i told ya guys its boring to stay at home even though there are so many things u can do at home.like waddahell!*haha*i feel that im changed.naja told me im weird.and yeah,i am weird.she asked me to think before making any hasty decisions.i just feel changed.after that incident,i keep cooping myself up in the room.im scared to face people somehow.everywhere i see is HIM.i dont know why this is happening to me.gosh,i think im just missing him a lot.well,enough of my life.i wanna show u guys about the designs for the toilet.its going out well,i guess.check it out ya! :]

sadness came into my life again...

2007-06-07T14:28:00.000+08:00

i cried so damn hard ytd.im so stupid.so,so stupid!i decided to break all my ties with him.why must he involve my mom?why must i say to him that he has no initiative at all?why????god,i love him.but i can't bring myself to tell him that i really,really love him.he's a great companion,a great friend and could be a great lover.but why did i decide to do this?he said its hard to communicate with me.but i always initiate the conversation.when he was online ytd,he didnt even bother to open up a conversation.whats so wrong about that?i didnt even see him online lah.i waited.i waited for him to do that for goodness' sake.guess we were just not meant to be.u always call me your dear.i did too.i thought i give u some hints to be open up to me.but no...everything was just a waste,k.i cried till late night.cant even sleep.cant even bother to eat.but life has to go on.and so i went to school today with such a gloom face.everyone kept asking but i just shrug.dont even bother to open my mouth.i want to meet naja!i want to talk to her.i thought he said he will always be there when i needed him.but no.he's gone when i really needed him.im a bitch.A BITCH!!!!arghhh.might as well i end my life now.or never. :(

GOODBYE EVERYONE!

THANKS ALOT!!!!!!!!!

2007-05-30T16:31:00.000+08:00

today doesnt seems good for me though.i have tried so hard to think positive for my everydays.but it doesnt seems worthy at all.i am me.me is my soul.my diary is my blog.my blog is my life.whatever harsh comments or remarks ive made here is up to me.i have come to a conclusion.i dont have anyone anymore.they are all gone from me.who am i suppose to turn to now?yesterday, i was on my own.i woke up in the morning and changed into school-based shirt.everyone in my family thought i went to school.i walked around and around.i felt....LONELY is the word.what i felt was abnormal.i felt oblivious to the surroundings.i almost died while i was crossing the road.what was i thinking?im not sure, either.i should be more careful and independent.ive always been independent but yesterday, the feeling overthrown me.maybe that will be the feeling when im in the other world.sighhh.life's getting dull for me.and for goodness sake's, its the hols.what am i suppose to do?ira will be on her vacation, amee im not sure (must be busy with SILAT), naja will be home this hols i guess.me?guess i dont have any plans this hols.will be going to the library often-my only time for peace.watching one or two movies.and ya, going to loiter around at any place u can think of with friends of course.*haha*im thinking about hooking up now.*hahahahaha*waddahell.guys,guys,guys.come out and grab girls.and when i say that, it means NOW!!!!*haha*im like feeling fuckedup now.just feel like mingling at the club and grab somebody.I WANT TO GROW UP!!!!!arghhh.*haha*am i behaving like a "tak-cukup-sifatnye" orang??waddahell.im smsing ira now.she will be disappearing like in....hmmm.im not good in math.waddahell.*hehe*what do i do?what do i do?hmmm.tomorrow's vesak day.HAPPY VESAK DAY TO ALL!enjoy ah.when you jolly2, go and lolly2.then when lolly2, go mind your doggy2.dig me,guys?waddahell.everyone seems so happy now.just not me.weelll, i see u soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon.taddaaaa. :]

{*If you want to get to the top in life,you are going to have to take the stairs.*}

boo!

2007-05-19T18:18:00.000+08:00

i am BACKKKKKKKK! and BACCKKKK with more newssssss.count ok the S's!!*hehe*now,im watching "PUAKA TEBING BIRU" with my FAV sisters-kak fyra, kak yanie,kak sheila and kak faridah.the actresses are nasha aziz and umie aida.super hot-babes... :) anyway, i have a lot of problems. first,friends.secondly,me.thirdly,guys.friends are my darlings in my life.they are the 3 wonders of my life.-sofia, naja, amee.*wow*and not forgetting ira...haiz.felt that everything is different now.being with friends just bring me a whole new new experience everyday.there's always this tingly feeling when i'm with them.maybe its just me who feels this way.whatever it is,i had a fight with one of my friends.it didnt bring any benefit at all.except that some dont bother about her during the fight,esp me.whatever.and she's scared of me.funny or what?aiyooo.in malay i would say "kalau layan,salah.tak layan, pun salah."waddahell.well though it happened few weeks back,it is still fresh in my mind.whatever misunderstanding that took place, it was for the best.im not blaming anyone but, mostly its her.she started this fight actually.sometimes its best to know about the history.dont ever,ever say that history will always be in the past and noone will ever know.but if u look at the mistakes Singapore has made in the past,they are trying to look into the past and teach the young generation about their mistakes.see, what i mean?so in Islam, when u do not speak to your relatives or your closed ones for three days-IT IS A SIN!so i go and baek2 with her.so now?hmm,i guess we're ok. :] next about me.my exam results is so poor lor.kanasai ah!*hehe*all borderline.AND failed maths.waddahell!*haha*i will be going back to school for classes during the hols.math,poa,eng and art.can u believe it?ART??LIKE HELLO?!!im not an art student, but the teacher said she sees in me that im hardworking.*smiles gleefully*haha.tak tau malunye orang.and about guys.just got to know about this guy.name is izwann.16 years old and schools at dunearn sec.i have seen him like a gazillion times but didnt take notice.waddahell!so now...still dono which one lah.jasper helped me through the intro.thanks alot jas! :] i miss him lah.miss smsing him.but i dont know why he dont want to reply my messages anymore now.thinking about this makes me sad.im sorry if i have done anything wrong to u,iz...well,i have learnt my lesson.be more3 caring towards a guy.*haha*thats all for now guys.will be back for more juicy gossips for u all. :DD

{*Do it trembling if you must,but do it !*}

final goodbye!

2007-04-14T14:35:00.000+08:00

hey y'all!its been a freaking long time since i last blogged.exams are coming.so i guess this is my last entry for this blog.I'LL BE BACK BY MAY 16!i think.*hehe*well,nothing much happened in my life.except that i saw zuhaili ytd.he was so cute!wearing all black.ahh.syukur alhamdullilah i saw him!*haha*called him these past few days but he's out of house.or should i say outstation.yeahh.maybe im going out later.wanting to return my books which are like so overdued-8 April!*haha*pictoplasma and popdelic designs will be out of my hands soon.haiz.so sad!*wakaka*and then u know what?mom didnt cook!!!!so freaking mad at her lah can?!im like so hungry now!ahhh.i become tarzan then u know!*hehe*will be buying cup noodle or macdonalds meal later when i go out.so freaking mad and sad!im alone and lonely (although there's my bro) at my house.except for my useless brother who is so useless and just seems to be useless and nevertheless,useless!thats it,U-S-E-L-E-S-S!*muahaha*okay,ira's sending me songs again.woohoo."candyman" and "with love"!wooh,love u ira!or should i say,FIZRAH?naja,naja,naja!what are u doing?hope ur having fun.bazmir!haha.well im gonna put song in my blog.so get ready to blast ur volume up!really,really UP!haha.umm,i guess till here im blogging.see u next month!missing u guys alot!

GOODBYE!

{*B,can i meet u?*}

problems

2007-04-08T15:25:00.000+08:00

hey.its been such a long time i blogged.many things happened to me this few days.too many i guess.it's just killing me inside.i have been having tear stained nights.it just sucks u know.when someone u know or cared about either do something to you or they get into serious troubles.

1.ZUHAILI

i found out from ira that he has a girlfriend already.

can u just imagine this?

i cant. and i wont.

the man that i love do this to me.

why doesn't he tell me earlier on that he has a girlfriend?

if i know he has one,i would just let this heart be in pain.

called him today to find out the truth.he's out AGAIN.

maybe dating with the girlfriend or whatnot.

haiz.sads me enough. :(

2.HAYRES

he told something serious yesterday.

i do not know if it's true or not.

but he sounded so convincing.and u just dont talk abt this anyhow right?

it's like a taboo.

so he told me that he went to the hospital and found out that he has...

brain tumour.

i was so goddamn shocked.

i mean like waddahell?waddahell?!

thats all.felt sad too.

good people always get this kind of test from God.

bad people? nah-ah!!

so well there's more actually.

but im stuck here doing my homework.

i'll update here again if i have the time.

GOODBYE FOLKS!

{*how can he do this to me?*}

haiz

2007-04-04T17:44:00.000+08:00

hmm.ira's sending me songs.alot!like 20+.muahahaha.anyway thanks.today was raining.i went home drenched to my skin.look like a duck!*hehe*nothing much happened!but i called zuhaili.but wrong timing!haiya.but at least i talked to him for 9 minutes.ok right?*hehe*he is so cute!wonder if i am gonna be with him again?!?! :)

{*just friends or wat,ira?kidding me ah?dont fool with me...*}

the gang!

2007-04-03T17:22:00.000+08:00

anyway look at all these pics!
they are like so us-ain(pink),amee(yellow),ira(purple) and naja(green)!

↓

haha! :)

umm.can i patch with you please?

2007-04-03T16:06:00.000+08:00

I WANT TO CALL HIM!

I MISS HIM!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

why must he go out everyday?

doesnt he know i call him like every single minute?!

haizzzzz.

well with ira's wishes for me to be with him, i feel so great!

thanks ira for pulling up my mood.

well, today in school i have detention class.

just because of skipping CME class??

my godd.pleaselah,Ms Sng!

dah jongang tu jongang lah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ISHHH. :)

been listening to ira's cd.

INTRODUCING....JOSS STONE!!!

WOOOHH.

it rocks my socks.

she look damn pretty with the red and black hair and studded nose.

thats cool, mann!! :)

so these words or phrases below is what i am last year.

its from that CD.

look. ↓

bruised but not broken

been alot of tear stained nights

i thought the tears were here for life,baby

the hurt came on and held on tight,yeah

took a chance, i took a fall

love broke my heart and shattered all my dreams

but i won't be down on my knees

cuz i'll rise above it

and i'll pick myself up

and i'll the shake the rain out of my heart

nice right?

haha.that was how i feel and experienced when i broke up with zuhaili.

yeahh.well, later i have madrasah.

and that suckks.

but its ok.haha.yaaaaa.

anyway....

this guy. name is hayres.

wants me to stead with him when i barely know him that well.

but he asked if he can win my love not want my love.

it means he is not a DESPERADO.

but stiill....haiz.anythinglah guys.

i do not understand guys.

HAVE A GOOD NIGHT'S REST!

P.S.btw,i didnt accept it.DUHH!

{* I LOVE ♥! *}

ira i love you!

2007-03-30T20:40:00.000+08:00

IRA NORRIS

ira.its ok.im right here for you.i will make u laugh with me, joke with me.and everything with me.i love u the old athirah!pls do come back.i just wanna see the old athirah who likes to laugh and have fun.do forget about him.u have us! :) i love you, can?!

NAJA JERMAN

whoever is with u naja,i will just support u.its ok if u do not want to tell me.im here for you,hun!!

pls be my friend forever... :) *haha* i love you can?!

AMIRAH AZMAN

hope u and tembam be together!u guys look so cute.brownies taste great darl!thanks.and i got gold for napha test.muahaha.i love you can?!

hey guys.

had a tiring day today.

anyway i called his house.

woooohhhhhhhooooooooo

adek die angkat.

so cute!

name's dillah.

woooooh.

i know at least one of his adek.

*muahahahaha*

she said die belum balek lagi.

naseb bkn mak die.

kalau tidak, huahuahuahua.

oklah,thats all folks!

GOODNIGHT!

{*i wanna be with him.even if its just one night...*}

lily!

2007-03-29T22:05:00.000+08:00

omg.guess what??

I MET ZUHAILI!!!

ok sorry for not blogging ytd.too sleepy!

so it was ytd when i met him.

wooooooohhhhhhooooooooooo

*hahahahaha*

naja told me that fateha told her that zuhaili is sumwhere near MiniMart.

i was so damn excited and shocked!

i mean like i have never seen him for at least 10 months and then suddenly,BOO!

then i saw that red bike of his and i knew it.

he was with fawas.i think.

AND I SAW.....ZUHAILI!

naja and ira helped me to call him.

naja teased him saying that he looks taller and etc.

so i went up to him.

we talked under the shade of this blooming tree.

it was so wonderful and romantic. :)

he was so cute lah , can?

then i started the conversation.

ain : how are you?

B : fine. how are you?

ain : eh, baek jugak! :)

B + ain : giggles (huahuahua)

B : mane faris? (snickers)

ain : huh? me and him mane ade ape2?!

B : hahaha (evil smile). How's school?

ain : oklah.

B : studies?

ain : oklah jugak. then how's ur school?

B : oklah.

ain : u amek what course eh?

B : potong besi.(ain giggles and he smiled)engineering course.

ain : i see.bagus-bagus!haha.

ain : fa'an dgn adam amek course ape?

B : fa'an same dgn i.adam...(actually i forgot what he said! :>)

ain : bagus-bagus! (he laughs)

ain : so huda amacam?

B : hah?

ain : u still maseh contact dgn die?

B : tak.i nak concentrate on my studies.i want to masuk (i think he said something NITEC)

ain : bagus-bagus!

B : yelah, kena belajar nanti takde future?

ain : yes,betul-betul!eh,kenape macam bapak2 ni?(he giggles)

B : tak pakai baju sekolah baru?

ain : tak. tanaklah.i dont like the blue.

B : haha.biru die,mcm tak lawa gitu.naseb baek,i dah graduate.sekolah skrg dah mcm2 seh.

ain : yup.merepek aje!

B : haha.so nak pergi mane ni?

ain : nak balek rumah.

B : kan balek rumah that way?(meaning my old route)

ain : u maseh ingat?

B : mestilah. :)

he keeps rolling the dead leaves on the ground.

B : oklah, i nak teman kawan i.die dari tadi sorang.

ain : oh ok.kalau dah dapat hp, tell me ur no tau.

B : ok,bye! :):):):):):)

and so i left that beautiful place after that.

this wasn't the accurate conversation that took place.

but, that was basiQally the whole story.

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

GOODNIGHT!

P.S. ira pls dont be sad!we are here for u. :)

{*Can i be given another chance to be with Zuhaili?*}

my life this year.

2007-03-27T16:41:00.000+08:00

hi everyone.

today wasn't a "TUESDAY BLUES".

fun and laughter filled up the atmosphere the minute i saw my girlfriends.

*haha*

girlfriends made it a point to live life to the fullest.

well, my post here today reflects my life this year.

time is catching up with my age.

nowadays, i feel so old.

i have senile dementia, falling hair, brittle bones and hearing problem.

muahahahaha....

*evil laugh-snorts*

basiQally, OLD!

naja, jgn marah aku menggunakan nama itu.huahuahuahua.

so yeah....

stress makes me feel alive.

emotions plays an important part in here.

my helping hand was not being appreciated at all. no thank you's, nothing!

just some pretty face that i see.

my studies getting from bad to worse.haiz.

then about my illness or sickness or whatever is it called.

if u all wonder, i have mechanic problems in my body.

thinking about it makes me wanna cry. :(

some knew about it. but i had asked them to keep it a hush-hush.

it has a cure.but even if there is one, i do not want to be cured.

worse-to-worse case, i need to go surgery.

im tired of living. im so,so tired.E-X-H-A-U-S-T-E-D!

tired of thinking, crying and all.

i just do not wanna think of my problems anymore.

it just tears me up.

GUYS?

they are the worse. ain't have one but want one.

currently there are 3 guys in my life.

one,ZUHAILI.two,HAYRES.three,_ _ _ _ _ _.

*hehe*

zuhaili is my first sweetheart.

the first time i saw him, i know i wanna be with him forever.

but it didnt last. it ended in a silent breakup.

haiz. so sadd.

i do still love him though.

hayres is a new guy i knew of recently in MSN.

he is damn sweeeet.

anyway, he is a Eurasian+Malay. MIXED GUY!

he made 2 poems and 1 song for me.

he is so sweet and cute! :)

but the shoccking part here, is that he calls me u know like darling in malay.

*hehe*

then, the poem which is so damn sweet made me blush.

called me gorgeous and all.

wooohh.

I LOIKE!

the third one is someone.

SSSHHH.

well, lets end it here.

have a good rest everyone!

muahhs.

{*if i cried because of that someone, does it means that i still love that someone?*}

boring saturday!

2007-03-24T12:46:00.000+08:00

im back from school. eh actually from ACS.muahhahha. im freaking bored. i feel like going to athirah's house. im freaking,uper-duper boring. and i just slept for 20 mins after got back from ACS. haha. so now, im doing nothing. just typing out things i want to be posted at my bloggie. u know , sometimes it can be irritating when someone u know just talk big. what? trying to show off is it? huh? aiyah... pleaselah if u are not an actor or actress, dont act like one! so my point here is that dont ever,ever try to talk big.haha. what a post is this?! i think i wanna go out and buy foodddddd. athirah's friend-FOOD! muahahahahahaha.

{*well, as a matter of fact, u are just a fat and stupid guy!*}

soldier in need here!!

2007-03-23T22:44:00.000+08:00

this which was the best day had turned into one living nightmare.

one living nightmare after school.

after eating my Zinger from KFC at ira's house, we tried to connect her MacBook to the internet.

but it refused.

in the end we use her old computer which was a bit slow.

it was not of a matter to me.

i went online and then the monster came and attack me.

it was going on fine.

until.....

he did it again!

its been several times he did this to me.

why must he scold me or even shout at me when i did nothing wrong?

everytime, i went online.

i do not find him.he was the one who will find me.

well though i was busy, i still entertain him.

was i wrong to be nice to someone?

was i???

he send me letter.

read it.

it was such a crappy letter.the crappiest i have ever read before.

wat stupid words u think that can cool my temper down?

huh??

even if u do not wanna chat with me or anything, can't u just talk to me nicely?

are u even a man?a man that has such a big EGO that it just burst?

i just don't dig guy's "so-called" pride, machoness and whatever shit they called it.

it's just so hard to find one guy who is just good, handsome, kind-hearted and all!

haiz.

i just need a soldier just like Naja does.

sighhh.

{*GO TO HELL!FUCK U FARIS!*}

popdelic designs and pictoplasma

2007-03-18T21:37:00.000+08:00

im just gonna post graphic designs...
U ALL ARE SO GONNA FALL IN LOVE WITH THESE GRAPHIC DESIGNS!!!!

<*this is the book where there are a lot of flower designs*>

and now the one u have been waiting for.....PICTOPLASMA!!!!
<*this is the book which elly likes so much "PICTOPLASMA"*>

<*amee.i know it doesnt looks like her, but this pic shows her with headphones*>

<*elly monster!*>

<*athirah, my eating monster.i tell u non-stop!*>

<*naja!the one who loves to on her laptop at night.*>

<*shazana.dont ask me why.haha.*>

<*syafiqa!the pinky girl who now has red hair.*>

well,thats it folks...see u soon!

anyway i cut my hair.wooohooo.

{*im just a black county girl, living in an extra ordinary world.*}

March Holidays is a bore!!

2007-03-16T15:56:00.000+08:00

hey.

its been like 7 days since i post one.

well,im quite busy with homeworks. its damn alot.

with my endless CCA meetings during the holidays.

haiz. the tiredness just kills me.

and my housework chores to add.

was more like a "DOOMSDAY" to me than a March "HOLIDAY"...

wonder will all of these benefit me in the future.

saturday, im going out with my girlfriends.

watching "THE HAUNTED SCHOOL".

thats a yippee-yay-yay situation.

however......

amee may not be following.

well, one must sacrifice for friends right?

im in a situation where .....

well,nvm.

i just dont know how to explain it.

to me, i like to watch movies especially horror movies in late afternoon.

but amee has silat training.

im not sure yet.

we havent discuss this again.

haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

well, i will call them later to confirm about this.

at night, have "SUPERNATURAL"!!!

AHA.yeahah,ah whooo,yoyo.AHA.

am i weird or what?

or am i the psycho that naja wrote in her blog?

haha.im kidding naja!

aku ni buat lawak tak tentu pasal.

"chek bukan nye apo, tapi chek semenjak-dua menjak ni asek pakai apo ni namenya?lap....top.ya laptop!"

ok craziness has come in my life.

that was bahasa pineng for ur info.

*haha*

well, lets end my entry here with new pics.

CHECK IT OUT, DARLINGS!

<*inside a toilet after watching DanceWorks 2007 at Marina Square*>

<*me and naja*>

{*i wanna love him.but he's just so far from me...*}

Find that one good friend, i suggest.

2007-03-09T23:02:00.000+08:00

u know what?

anyone could say "i harts my friends","sista lup" or whatever that has got to do with friends.

but me , im not.

i may sound selfish or something.

but who cares??

this is my blog.

i have the rights to write about what i want.

talk to me face-2-face if u feel that its u.

well,let me share my agony with u.

i have a best friend-A.

A has change drastically since the first time i know

everything had change,as for what i know.

he may sound like a *****.

A is into stupid stuffs.

i am not sure if A will change or not?

what i know is, it has left a great impact on my life.

A shows me how larger the life is.

A shows me how to be someone that everyone know.

im so proud of A until this year.

A just changed from being bad to worse.

has A really change the friends' attitude?

am i included too?

did A change me?

i ain't sure.

but what i know now, that u can make 10000 friends.

but will u get that 1 friend that respects u, kind-hearted, knows how to keep a secret, humble, knows how to make u laugh when u are sad, and so on?

NO!

the answer is just a "NO!!"

maybe a few of u has that one special friend.

im just the unfortunate one,i guess.

well this long entry is for anyone out there who feels the same way as i do.

goodnight.

<*i think life without friends should be a try-out for everyone*>

Fatter side of me!

2007-03-08T17:37:00.000+08:00

i like elly's blog.

so MONSTER-ish!!

*woohooo*

and my other friends' blog.

well since i started blogging,

i feel like i wanna write here every single day.

blog do helps me releases stress

and what happens at school that day.

today had IT lesson.

eat "OHEYA"!!

eat onlyy.*haha*

now im having stomach cramps.

*bluek*

watching "HAPPY FISH" at channel 8.

oklah,i need to have a rest and wanna eat my tea time snack.

which is milo freeze and oreo and ....

FOOD AGAIN!!

im gonna gain weight soon,if this goes on.

*hahahaha*

see the fatter side of me.

well, have a good day tmr!

{*I wonder if running away from life is good.*}

whats left of me?

2007-03-06T18:01:00.000+08:00

well. life has been going a tremendous change for me. maybe its just me who has change. have i been the same girl as the last few years everyone knew of? or was it just me who is saying this out of the blue? uhmm. im not sure myself. now i wanna bathe and get ready to go to madrasah. i hope things would turn out smoothly tomorrow. and gahh, tomorrow i have CCA. this sucks...

{*is my life a dread?*}

pinkyee me (:

2007-01-16T17:28:00.000+08:00

HEY PEOPLE!

it's me.but if u really wanna noe who the hell is this girl, then lets look at the pic i posted here.

ME!!

*hehe*

now u know who i am right?pls link me or tag me lah.

I LOVE YOU!

tOODLEs (: